33 Risen#re

Lirain wondered his room aimlessly, his head a blender of thoughts, all messy and hard to make out.

A single fear kept creeping up in the back of his mind, '...what if she decides she doesn't want me anymore and kicks me out.'

Several times he packed a few clothes into a bag and unpacked it, turning his room into a mess.

---

Taliyah fared no better than Lirian, her mind swirling in chaos but as she did her best to calm down a few things he said fit into place in her head.

The eldest god Adolin Morningstar, she knew the name, he was always revered as the greatest god until 200 000 years ago, when he betrayed the gods, along with the sinful gods, the virtuous gods, and the greatest noble-beast gods.

From what Lirian had said, his father took on the curse in his place, and from what she had seen in the vision it was clear as day that those who are cursed are seen as the enemy of all creation, which would explain why the gods call him a traitor.

She thought of the things he had said and wondered what his real age could possibly be, could he have been a god in a past life, as she thought of that, ridiculous as it was, she could imagine him as one. 'If he was a god, how am I to treat him.'

After all, cultivators worshiped and revered the gods, it was the final goal for all of them, and yet it was an almost impossible task to accomplish.

After a long time, she got up and went to visit him, his room was a complete mess with clothes and bags lying all over the place, and he was sitting on his bed holding a glass case, inside it was the sword that she gave to him when he was four.

She was surprised to see it whole; she couldn't help but feel happy to see that he had restored it and after a quick inspection she found that it wasn't missing a single splint.

"Little o... uhm... Lirian," she said and walked in slowly, "You should have thrown it away I can always make you another one."

He smiled, albeit a little bitterly at how she addressed him, she usually only used his name when she was mad at him or it was something urgent, "I told you when you gave this to me it's the kind of creation that deserves to be displayed."

"I suppose that it makes sense now, why you were so good at everything you did and why you try so hard to seem like an adult. You probably never needed my help."

"No, I didn't," he replied honestly, ", but I enjoyed every moment of it, however mother you shouldn't feel too disappointed even amongst my kind I'm still a genius like no other," he smiled slightly smug, he had never had the opportunity to brag about himself in the past, and it felt oddly satisfying to him.

"There are other others like you?", she asked in surprise.

He nodded, "They call themselves the eternals, each of them have done things that have changed entire worlds, but like the rest of the world they have always been my enemy, if you want to recognise them you have to take note of their eyes, they all have slightly rare eye colours at first glance but if you take particular note of their eyes, you will find that the colour is completely irreplicable, a shade of a colour that can never be remade by even the god of all artists."

"If everyone in your past viewed you as an enemy does that mean that you were always alone?" she suddenly asked, the question felt like a revelation to herself, it didn't even occur to her at that moment, and to her surprise, Lirian shook his head.

"There were a few exceptions, in the grand scheme of things, the times that I had someone with me can't even make up a slight fragment of my life, and yet those times were..." he shut his mouth he didn't want to speak further, losing the times he had some companionship was some of the hardest things he had to face, it was what truly pushed him into madness time and again, "Forget it, some things are best left in the past."

Taliyah's instincts took over and before she realised it, she had wrapped her arms around him and hugged him from behind, "If you can't tell me about your past then you can show it to me like you did with Anya?"

He shook his head gently, "That memory that Anya saw was an accident, and we are lucky that it was only an earlier memory of mine."

"Mom, in one of my past lives I was known as the god of despair, can you guess why?"

Taliyah shook her head, but her eyes had grown wide at the revelation, 'You really were a god!'

"It's because the punishment I used on my most hated enemies were my memories, after experiencing it they would go mad, they'd kill everyone they ever knew, and ruin their great and mighty names, others would even take their own lives."

"My memories are a curse and they are also dangerous for the world, there are secrets about me that must never be known to anyone, I know that you want to know about my past mom, I'll tell you what I can but there are some things about me that if known will bring ruin to the entire world, not mortals, immortals or even gods will be able to stop themselves from coming after me."

"I-I see...", she said softly, a ball of dread filled her heart as she thought of what he could possibly know that could make gods go crazy, "Then can you tell me how many lives you have lived?"

Lirian smiled slightly, it was a simple question on the surface but for him, it was a very complicated question, of the eternals there were a few he considered cockroaches but to the eternals he was something much, much worse, even with those cockroach-like bodies they created, at least if he dumped them in a star or stomped them flat, they'd die, but to them, he was the thing of nightmares.

Even if their power was several stages above his as long, he had a cultivation they could never be sure if he was dead, even if they dumped his body into the largest and hottest sun in existence or used the power of a god to kill him, they would go mad in their quest to confirm his death and when they were finally confident in his death, he would pay them a visit and reap some lives.

"I've lived many lives but if we are being technical, it's only 33 lives I've lived, and this life of mine is very confusing as well, it can be considered, my 1st, 33rd, or 34th, depending on how one looks at it."

Taliyah nodded but felt uncertain, it was truly as he said, confusing. "Lirian there is one more thing I'd like to know, did you ever plan on telling me the truth?"

Lirian felt himself shake, "I wanted to honestly, but I was afraid... if you learned the truth about me, I was afraid that you'd hate me, so no I would have probably never told you." he answered honestly.

She let go of him and hurriedly began to leave, "Put all your clothes away, and get ready for school tomorrow, you'll say that you had a complication with your arm which is why you missed your first day."

When she left, he looked around hopelessly, he was being honest, but it still hurt her, '....being normal is so complicated, in the past, the world was just a single shade everyone was my enemy but now there are too many shades to understand and I'm still in my home, what is the real world going to be like?