Chapter 416 - Everybody Grows Up
Noah sat down next to Violet on the bed and reached out to squeeze her hand. He wasn't sure how else to make her feel better.
"Everybody grows up, Vi. I've actually done a little reading on twins…sometimes one twin resents being paired together all the time and wants to do their own thing. He still loves you, that much is obvious. But you're good at everything Kaleb is not. I can see why he would be jealous of you. He's probably trying to get out from under your shadow."
She blinked at him in surprise. Kaleb did complain about how perfect she was all the time. It was a big part of his teasing. Could that really be it?
Violet wasn't perfect though. It was all an act. She tried her very best because she was afraid of losing the love of the people around her if she didn't.
Everybody always told her how beautiful and smart and talented she was. Of course she enjoyed the praise but there seemed to be an unspoken expectation to be beautiful and smart and talented all the time. Like there was no room for mistakes.
Her mom always told her that mistakes were a part of life and helped people grow but she couldn't believe that. There was no way her famous, ultra-brainy scientist mother ever made mistakes. The same went for her famous, mega rich, Fortune 10 CEO father.
There were so few people in this world that actually liked her. Violet couldn't bear to lose the affection of a single one of them. Nobody at school really cared about her. She wasn't close to anyone outside of her family other than Noah.
If she slipped up…if she failed at something…would they stop loving her? She couldn't handle even thinking about it.
As for her Kaleb problem…he was good at a bunch of things she was bad at too! Like anything involving a ball. Or interpersonal skills. He made friends anywhere he went and she had always wished she could do the same.
He walked through the world filled with other people with ease. Violet had to work very hard to carve a place for herself there and even so it still felt like she was a square peg trying to fit into a round hole.
"But he's good at everything I'm not too," she said quietly. "And I'm not pushing him away. All I'm doing is pushing back when he gives me a hard time because it hurts me. I don't want him to treat me like this. I want my twin back."
Tears filled her eyes and she never cried. Somehow having a person she could vent all of her worries to made a dam break.
Noah wrapped his arms around her without hesitation the moment he saw her tears. "Hey, it's okay. You guys will work things out. No matter what you're still family. Don't you know that sibling relationships are the longest ones there are? I read that somewhere. You have plenty of time."
Violet sobbed into his shoulder since she was so much taller than him. Would time really fix this? They needed to talk but she doubted Kaleb would go along with it. He wasn't into emotional stuff like that.
Growing up, whenever they squabbled about something he always ended arguments by making her laugh. Nothing ever got truly resolved because he wouldn't let it be. He preferred to move on and forget rather than actually try to fix the problem at hand.
The door opened and Jennica's cheerful voice called, "Dinner's ready!" She saw the girl sobbing in her son's arms and immediately changed her tone. "Oh. I see I came in at a bad time. You alright, Violet?"
She shook her head but was too embarrassed to speak after getting caught. Jennica was her mom's best friend; she would definitely tell her about this. And then Violet would have to explain why she cried.
"I made potato soup. Soup makes everything better. Why don't I bring your bowls up here," Jennica offered gently before heading back downstairs.
"Your mom is really nice," Violet hiccupped.
She wiped at her eyes and was annoyed to find that her mascara had smeared. Great. Just great.
Hopping off the bed, she checked her eyes in his mirror and yelped. She looked like the lady in that old movie "Mulan" that her mom showed her as a kid who got an entire pot of tea poured on her head, minus the drawn on mustache.
Noah handed her a pack of tissues.
"I look like that lady from Mulan," she said ruefully. He would get the reference; he had seen the movie too.
"Nah, you're way prettier than her."
Violet dabbed at her eyes and eventually ended up asking Jennica for some makeup remover when she came up with their soup. She disappeared into her room and came back with a makeup removing wipe.
She thanked her and the older woman smiled before heading back downstairs. Violet and Noah sipped their soup in silence.
To be perfectly honest, she didn't even feel awkward crying on her friend. She only felt awkward about getting caught by his mother. That was how things were between them. There was no need to be embarrassed about anything because they got each other.
He understood that she had a complex inner world and struggled to break out of it and relate to real people. She understood that he had the tendency to talk way too much when he was excited and had a hard time focusing on anything.
Though they grew progressively more different as they got older, they always clicked. Violet wished she could say the same about her twin.
The farther away she got from Kaleb, the more she worried the same thing would happen with Noah someday. What if they weren't always like this? What if he grew to resent her too?
Because of his focusing issues, he had never been all that great at school. He got hyperfixated on certain subjects for certain lengths of time but he bounced back and forth between that and not being able to focus at all.
So he could tell you anything at all about dinosaurs or how airplanes fly but couldn't finish a math assignment without some serious help. His mom didn't know how to help him and his dad wasn't home until dinner time so Noah frequently didn't finish his homework. And if he did, he did it wrong.
Violet helped him whenever she could but she was pretty busy with ballet. They were usually only able to meet up and work on things around dinner time.
"Do you resent me because I have good grades?" she asked suddenly.
Noah looked at her like she had sprouted another head. "Why would I do that? You're the only reason my grades aren't worse."
He currently had a C average, which would allow him to move onto the 7th grade. Without Violet's help he would most definitely be flunking math. It was so much harder for him to focus on than reading homework.
It had been a dumb question. Noah didn't think the same way Kaleb did. There had to be a better question she could ask that would get the answer she was looking for.