A WISH TO GRAB HAPPINESS

Volume 4, Chapter 86: A woman named Eldith

Eldith’s vision flickered for a moment and she lost her sense of balance temporarily. Then, after several sensations on her eyelids, her eyes finally opened up.

A scene was reflected on her eyes when she woke up. It was a familiar scene. She gazed at her own bed in the Tower. Eldith put her fingertips on the bed to reaffirm that it was real.

Somehow, after creating the illusion, Eldith felt a weird sensation all over her body. As if, her soul came back to her body once again. Sometimes she would even doubt that her real body was really her own. Eldith lost the sense of her real self every time she invoked the illusion skill. A weird feeling that made her feel as if one day she would lose her real body forever.

Either way, it seemed that her role got fulfilled in some way. Eldith loosened her cheeks slightly. This complexion wasn’t a fierce expression. She wasn’t entirely driven by a swirl of emotions. But her face showed that she was slightly upset.

She didn’t know if she had achieved correctly what he asked for. Therefore, Eldith wasn’t sure if Lugis would be satisfied with the outcome. With that in mind, she pulled her legs off the bed to get out of the bedroom.

Suddenly, the full-length mirror came into her eyesight. What reflected on the mirror was the appearance of Eldith getting out of the bed. The hair bounced slightly, and her untidy clothes resembled a man’s clothes. The disorder of her appearance was rather noticeable. She always looked like this, at least as far as she remembered. At least, since she got imprisoned in the Tower. Yet, for her, this appearance felt different today. Her eyelashes twinkled as she realized that this complexion might not be as good as it always were. Eldith’s foot stopped before leaving the room.

Her slender fingers straightened her hair to style it with loose waves. She fixed the unkempt clothes. Then, she washed her face with fresh water. After a short moment, Eldith blinked her eyes as she observed herself in the mirror.

“I wonder if my looks are okay now”. When Eldith thought that it would be better for her to put a hairpin on the hair, suddenly, her cheeks dyed in vivid red.

“What on earth am I doing?” Eldith had never cared about her figure before. She always preferred men’s clothing than a lady-like assemblage. She never felt overwhelmed by her choice of attires because it made her feel comfortable. Yet, it felt different this time. Why? This change confused her since she never thought much of her appearance, and what suited her best.

Therefore, she never really combed her hair. She never groomed herself, nor did she worry about her looks. Until now.

“Why am I doing these things right now?”

Eldith shook her big blue eyes and diverted them from the mirror. For a short moment, Eldith felt as if she was a maiden who had spent her time decorating herself. “I don’t remember having such a hobby before.”

“Generally speaking, the person I’m going to meet is that rough-looking human Lugis. I wonder why I need to pay attention to myself. What for?” With that in mind, Eldith reached out for the door that separated the bedroom from the living room.

She swallowed dry for a few times in front of the door. After taking deep breaths, Eldith opened the wooden door with one hand, while stroking her hair naturally with the fingertips of her other hand. The old-fashioned cracking sound was heard upon the opening of the wooden door.

「Hey, I’m back. I’ve done it. It wasn’t so bad, you know. At least, I won’t have to fight blindfolded anymore.」

She didn’t declare whose achievement it was. She just let a slightly higher voice leak from her throat to profess those words.

However, even after waiting for a while, the expected voice didn’t come back from the living room. Strange. She spoke but that little ironic voice didn’t reply to her.

A dissatisfied Eldith looked into the living room with her sharp eyes. Then, she finally saw the figure she was looking for. He was there, as usual. However, the figure of this man dressed in a green robe had his eyes closed while sitting in a chair.

Eldith slowly approached this human man without making a noise, and looked into his face from a close-up range.

She noticed that he took regularly deep breaths. His eyelids remained unopen. “I see. No doubt about it. Lugis has fallen asleep while sitting in this chair.”

Once again, Eldith’s lips quivered because of the dissatisfaction she felt on her chest. Her eyes slightly strengthened upon looking at Lugis. She never really expressed her emotions that much. But, now that she looked fixedly at his appearance, all she could feel was a clear disgust.

She had the trouble of making an illusion as he requested her to do. All in order to make reconnaissance activities. However, after all that trouble, when she returned, the person in charge was asleep. If he ordered her to make some illusions, then it was his duty and obligation to wait for her in order to see the results. Eldith looked at Lugis’ sleeping face and sharpened her lips.

However, Eldith blinked her eyes and reconsidered her thoughts.

“Well, he didn’t sleep much last night.” Thinking about it, Lugis supported Eldith’s body all night long. He held her without a night’s sleep. Yes, this body of his.

Somehow, Eldith shook her ears.

“I see. If this is the reason why he is sleeping, then I mustn’t be that harsh with him. I’ve heard that the human body is neither strong nor durable. If I think about yesterday, I have to admit that it is obvious that he is tired. Taking a moment of sleep won’t do any harm anyways”.

Eldith gently touched his hand placed on the chair. It was strangely small. Especially because he was sort-of a knight. Eldith thought that forgiveness was a measure of who stands above it; therefore, she let him sleep peacefully.

After settling her thoughts, Eldith looked at his sleeping face again. The frustration had finally disappeared from Eldith’s chest. Rather, she recognized her partner’s work and praised him.

She didn’t want Lugis to worry now. She believed from the bottom of her heart that without him things would’ve been different. That’s why she mustn’t have useless and bitter thoughts now.

Nonetheless, it was clear that Eldith’s hostility towards humans had faded away because of him. Eldith blinked her eyelashes repeatedly once again.

At first, Eldith felt compassion for him since both sympathized with each other’s feelings. She felt that they had given up on everything. Because of these defeating feelings, she thought that they had a relationship where they could understand their wounds.

However, that was Eldith’s misunderstanding. In fact, it was a one-sided feeling. Lugis said it himself. He didn’t want to give up or die. On the contrary, he said that he would try to live regardless of the consequences. Eldith’s blue eyes were deeply fixated on Lugis.

A smile leaked from Eldith’s cheeks who continued to gaze at Lugis’ sleeping face.

“C’mon, what I am doing again. This is so shameful. I should have left him there to die. Why did I save his neck? After all, he is just a human and I am the Elf Princess. It is absurd to even compare us.”

These thoughts crossed through Eldith’s mind for countless of times. Nevertheless, this time was different. Eldith didn’t feel that way anymore. If there was no Lugis, she would have lost her spirit and soul in the Tower with the passage of time. Her roots would have gone crazy.

Surely, she wouldn’t have the courage to leave the Tower and try to reach for the sky. There was no way that she would have been able to get back on her feet in this earth.

“Ah, that’s right. I would have given up on everything if I threw his hand away from mine. If Lugis accepts me as I am, I will be delighted to follow him wherever he’ll go”.

Eldith grabbed Lugis’ stretched fingers and entangled them with her own fingers. She held his fingers strongly, but not strongly enough so that he won’t wake up.

「You told me this before. You said that I mustn’t run away from my problems. That I must face them and get involved in your flow. I was surprised when you said those words.」

Eldith recalled his words one by one. She continued to speak with Lugis, who was asleep. These were like congratulatory words. But, at the same time, they were like a “curse”.

「You know what, elves are a very obsessive race. The emotions we hold can never be scratched away that easily. Never.」

Elves couldn’t change their ways rapidly due to their longevity, such as thoughts, habits, and emotions. Anything that floated in their everyday life, that made them change a little, would be something everlasting. Summing up, the deeper it was, the more it was engraved in their hearts. Yes, the more permanent it became.

Eldith kind of signed a contract with Lugis. He said he wouldn’t let her go, since they were caught in the same stream. Therefore, Eldith accepted him. And he accepted her. Yes, a contract of cooperation.

Still, Eldith had not completely forgiven herself. She didn’t trust everything nor everyone. She didn’t accept everything as it was.

Regardless of those feelings, Lugis said he wouldn’t let her go.

Eldith accepted that binding contract.

「I am going to keep my promises. I swear to you on my own pride.」

Eldith whispered those words on Lugis’ still-sleeping ears.