Because I Cannot Hurt You

Chapter 128 – Be Selfish

Beijing.

"Young miss, we have reached the address," The driver said. 

Zizi craned her neck and took a look at Yunru's home. She nodded. "Okay."

By that time, heavy downpour began in Beijing too as the entire city was enveloped with thundering clouds, violently clashing against each other.

"Young Miss. Please stay inside. I will take him home. You don't have to take the trouble."

Zizi cleared her throat. "It's okay. I can handle him. I will take him inside. You hold the umbrella."

"Mhmmm…hehe…hehehe…" Yunru giggled as he played with Zizi's hair. "Whoosh! There you take the flight!"

"…"

He suddenly waved his hand. "I will bring justice in this world!"

Zizi sighed. He was hopelessly drunk. With the help of the driver, Zizi took him out of the car. His arm was wrapped around her neck and she felt crushed under his pressure.

S-so heavy! Gosh, he looks so lean, but is actually so heavy!

"Young Miss. I will help you…"

"No, no. I am fine. Just hold the umbrella steady. We shouldn't get wet."

The driver and Zizi somehow brought Yunru inside and laid him on his bed. She let out a deep breath in exhaustion.

Finally!

"Hmm…justice…Soo Yunru is here," he mumbled, being completely intoxicated.

Zizi thought for a moment.

Is it fine to just leave him like this? 

She glanced at the driver. "You go back and stay in the car. I will come back in a while."

The driver nodded and left.

Zizi looked at him and put her hands on her waist. "Now where to begin…Let me begin with his clothes. They have gotten all dirty and messed up because of the sand."

She looked around and opened his cupboard for a change of clothes. She quickly went back to his side and kept them aside. 

"Be grateful that Han Zizi is taking care of you…" she grumbled.

She removed his shoes and dumped them aside. Then as she sat beside him, she suddenly stiffened as she thought of changing his clothes. That felt a little too personal.

"I-I got no choice. If he catches a cold, he would only blame me!"

She peeked at him and blushed. Her hands trembled as she slowly unbuttoned his shirt. As his muscular chest came into full view, she gulped at that sexy sight. His toned upper body made her heart skip a beat. 

Yunru suddenly moved and laughed. "Haha! Princess…what are you doing hehe…"

She froze. "Stop moving!"

Yunru became quiet like an obedient child and straightened up. Zizi harrumphed and took off his shirt. Suddenly, her sight fell on the scar on his abdomen. She remembered what Yunru had said. He got this scar on one mission when he was stabbed in the gut.

She could still see the faint scar. In a daze, her fingers brushed over it. The thought of that stab wound and blood sent shivers down her spine. She touched her chest, trying to calm herself. 

Why is my heart beating so fast? The wound has already faded away. Still, it must have hurt so bad at that time…

She felt a dull pain envelope her chest. 

"Sexual assault! I am *hiccup* arresting Princess on charges of *hiccup* sexually assaulting an officer!" Yunru pointed his finger at her.

She looked at him in horror. "W-what nonsense!" Her cheeks turned red and she looked away. "Why would I, Han Zizi, touch a lowly man like you? Hah!"

He giggled. "No no no. Now you cannot run awayyyy…You were ogling and touching my *hiccup* handsome body. Your lustful thoughts are clear!"

"…"

Zizi gritted her teeth. "Shut up! If you are so energetic, then change your clothes yourself!"

She stomped her foot and turned away. Yunru grumbled and dizzily put the new pants on.

She asked impatiently, "Are you done?"

"Boooooo…"

Her mouth twitched. What boo?

She turned and saw him fumbling with his buttons. They were all buttoned in the wrong order. Zizi sighed. "Leave it. I will help you."

Yunru furrowed his brows and tilted his head. "Princess is acting so nice today…"

She glared at him. "I am always nice!"

No comment.

"Say something! Don't keep quiet."

"Hehe…hehehe…" he sheepishly grinned.

Zizi flared and got up again. "You are so annoying. Now that I have changed your clothes, my work is done here! Hmph. I will leave. Don't forget. You have to pay me back for all my help."

"Tsk. Cho cheap!"

"You!" She jumped in to strangle him. "Who are you calling cheap? I brought you here in my expensive car. You would have never dreamed about riding in such a lavish car, don't you? And then I helped you so much. How dare you call me cheap?"

"If you are not cheap *hiccup* then don't ask for a payback haha…"

Yunru laughed loudly. Zizi quietly watched him like that. At the beach, he was so heartbroken and bawling his eyes out. But now his usual cheery smile was back.

Suddenly, Yunru felt a little wet on his left cheek. He looked up and his eyes widened to see her crying. "You.. why are you cryingggg?"

Her lips trembled. "You…as I thought…you look better when you laugh. You were so ugly when you cried."

"Ugly?" He scratched his chin. "This Soo Yunru is *hiccup* is always handsome."

She burst into a chuckle. She softly held his cheek and whispered, "You should find a woman who loves you too."

He frowned. "Another woman?"

"En. I-If…" she said in nervous anticipation, "if someone else ever confessed to you, would you give her a chance?"

She didn't know why she was asking this question. She felt stupid, but she couldn't help it.

Yunru indignantly said, "No chance! *Hiccup* I will only love her. Nobody else."

At that moment, as if a thorn stabbed her; she felt a pain shoot in her heart that ripped into pieces.

No chance…

Zizi felt envious of that woman. Yunru loved her so much. Even after seven years, he was waiting for her and refused to look for someone else.

You are so… lucky. Wish it would have been-

She froze as the word 'me' came at the tip of the tongue. Zizi bit her lip. She panicked and pressed the space between her brows. 

This is so confusing. I can't possibly feel jealous of that woman! What is wrong with me?

Yunru poked her cheek and laughed. "You are making funny faces Princess *hiccup*…you knit your brows, then you suddenly widen your eyes…hehe then it seems like you are angry, but then you seem nervous too…"

Zizi pinched his cheek hard.

"Ow!!! Where are my handcuffs!" Yunru fumed.

"Can you think of anything else other than arresting me?"

He giggled like a child. "Nooooo. Because it's fuuuuunnnn~~"

"…"

She twisted his cheek even more. "Heyyy-" He quietened when he saw Zizi softly smiling instead. He was hell intoxicated for sure, but even in that state, he felt the sadness behind her smile.

"Princess…" he muttered under his breath. 

Zizi leaned in and bumped her forehead against his. "Yunru. Be a little selfish. Don't waste your feelings on someone who doesn't know how to respect and reciprocate them."

Yunru visibly stiffened. "Sh-she is not like that…I respect her and she *hiccup* respects me too…"

She sadly chuckled. "Are you trying to convince me or yourself?"

He couldn't retort.

"Feelings are really precious, Yunru. A-and they…" she softly gasped as she let out the tears, "really hurt too. So, don't bear so much pain. It's not worth it. Don't…Don't chase after her anymore…"

Yunru stared at her in a stupor. 

Ah…so that is why…

He raised his hand and gently tucked back the lock of her hair that was hiding her tears from his sight. "I see. You are crying for me…"

She trembled, and the tears burst out even fiercer. "You are an idiot. Chase after someone who is ready to chase after you too. Who is desperate to win your love as much as you are desperate to win hers."

She gritted her teeth and pulled his shirt. "A one-sided love will always hurt you, Yunru! So-so why are you willing to bear so much pain? Don't torture yourself like that. This is not love. This is foolishness that you are doing. You say she respects you too?"

"She d-does…" His voice didn't have that confidence as before.

"Then you wouldn't have been such a mess tonight! Just look at yourself. You are so drunk precisely because you couldn't bear it any longer!"

His eyelashes trembled.

"Yunru…" Zizi's tears fell on his cheeks. Her shivering fingers held his face and she didn't realize it herself when she kissed him. It was soft and her lips trembled. The only thing she could think of at that moment was to relieve him of his sorrow even if a little bit.

Yunru felt a warm sensation on his lips and his eyes slowly shut themselves, a tear escaping his eyelids.

When she parted away, Yunru dazedly touched her and whispered, "Princess…"

—

As Zhiyuan's tall figure loomed upon her, their misty gazes locked onto each other. Xinyi's small stature was completely blocked by his broad chest. His thumb brushed across her lower lip and he leaned to kiss her again. He parted away and intensely stared at her that turned her cheeks red.

"Xinyi…"

His mellow voice tickled her ears as he lovingly whispered her name. "Xinyi I…"