Bro, I’m not an Undead!

488 Eat The Child, Don't Eat The Child!



“What in the never-ending spinal…!” Skullius began when he carefully read the entire description, his sockets inhaling every detail.

His hands eventually covered his mouth as his flames flared wildly, a tremble that nearly made the Incalescent Mountain Breath atop his head fall off running through his dark blue bones.

“This…” Skullius said, his reaction drawing the attention of Yuyui and Ferex who asked the same question in different ways.

What was wrong?

Well…

~~~

[Chubby Remnant Child of Polarity]

<Unique>

A living consumable that grants EXTREME, STUPENDOUSLY DESIRABLE LUCK in one instance, in exchange for another instance of FIENDISHLY ABBHORRENT LUCK.

-Caution-

Remnant Child must be chewed and consumed whole for maximum effect.

-Caution-

Remnant Child must be consumed within an hour upon summoning, otherwise it will perish and disappear. The effect after consumption also exists within the same hour.

-Caution-

The instance of FIENDISHLY ABBHORRENT LUCK will claim the user at an opportune time.

~~~

“Bro….” Skullius said as a dark shade of gloom and uncertainty covered his eyes.

What the flesh was this?

A change to turn his luck around to the extreme in one instance for another instance of luck that was clearly worse than what he had been dealing with?!

This sounded like a bitterly sweet scenario!

If his luck got any worse… just what would he be in for?

Also, there was an hour time limit.

“Damn it…”

This was unfair.

Skullius absolutely didn’t want to risk getting caught in whatever this FIENDISHLY ABBHORRENT LUCK had in mind… as no one would but…

The allure of STUPENDOUSLY DESIRABLE LUCK…

What was that?

What did it feel like?

Was it that incredibly good?

Would it feel like the world was revolving around him for a change?

Would that one instance make his Null Life worthwhile?

The Penetrator had the vague thing that Serenity mentioned which turned his bad luck around from time to time but…

This was more enticing!

Yet…

The FIENDISHLY ABBHORRENT LUCK…!

What if upon activation Somanda would just appear out of nowhere, donning a cloak of extremely bad writing and convenience that allowed to him to ignore the rules of the world established by the Deities and do whatever he wanted?!

What if Skullius literally just vanished from existence by some inexplicable reason that defied all logic, sending him to some alternate world where Bonet was Somanda and Somanda was Bonet, his best friend?!

What if Somanda….

Skullius breathed out a husky false breath. Enough with Somanda.

There were so many bad things that Skullius wouldn’t just risk giving a free ticket towards him.

This was extremely attractive but… the Penetrator was literally looking for a reason to do it.

A reason and a way to ensure he wouldn’t regret it!

…!

A thought crept inside Skullius’ mind.

What if…

What if… by using this Chubby Remnant Child of Polarity, he attained extremely good evolution choices right now as he was about to evolve?!

Wouldn’t that count?

“Gah this stupid time limit! I don’t have anything that I can do with this luck on such short notice!” Skullius barked while plopping to the ground.

Maybe he could go to the stout mountain and waltz his way through the Spatial lightning and Distorted Gravity all the way to the dome where those treasures he desired were stored?

That felt like a waste.

What else could he do within an hour’s time?

Gah!

Yuyui could see that Skullius’ stress was coming from the baby in her hands but she couldn’t see what was so bad about it. At least in terms of the presence it gave off, there was nothing peculiar or particularly dangerous.

However, if there was something of note…

‘This ooze on the baby’s body… it’s disappearing bit by bit…’ Yuyui thought.

The slime or ooze that covered the Remnant Child had been quite abundant when it appeared but it was slowly vanishing, as if reacting to the open world.

It seemed like some form of protection for the Remnant Child and Yuyui couldn’t help but wonder what would happen when it ran out.

She wanted to point this out to Skullius but he seemed to have a lot on his plate.

Twenty minutes passed…

There were so many angles to look at this for the Penetrator, but he dreaded the consequences.

Each minute was spent debating the pros and cons, the cons and pros. Back and forth.

Solutions to the issue of the bad luck were abundant but he didn’t know if they would work.

Actually, he didn’t even know if this would work either!

His atrocious luck was a curse from an Arch-Lich!

Could it really be dispelled by a Unique grade… Child, even if only temporary?

Maybe this was a reason to try!

If the STUPENDOUSLY DESIRABLE LUCK effect didn’t activate then… didn’t that mean that FIENDISHLY ABBHORRENT LUCK factor also wouldn’t work?! For more chapters, please visit pan(da-n0vel.c)om

But that logic…

Gah!

There were too many consequences if it did work and they were much too potent!

But…

“Flesh this!” Skullius yelled as he stood. “I have two fail-safes for even if I die! What am I afraid of?! Let’s do this!” the Penetrator roared.

As he had told Sila back then, the aged soul was a contingency against what could possibly happen here, though he hadn’t told him the whole thing.

And if that didn’t work, there was a more, difficult route he could go through to try and disperse the FIENDISHLY ABBHORRENT LUCK before it even activated.

Bottom line was…

Skullius desperately wanted this luck effect!

He was willing to gamble on it!

To at least taste it!

Maybe he wouldn’t be able to get the Remnant Child again, after all, these were Random Upgrades and never had he gotten the same thing twice!

The Penetrator walked up to Yuyui who was firmly holding the oozing child and grabbed the thing from her and began walking away.

“Master… what are you doing…?” Yuyui asked with nervous eyes and a reluctant attitude.

“What must be done…” Skullius said with a hoarse, heroic tone as a shadow loomed over his eyes, masking his emotions as he held the fiddling Remnant Child in his hands.

Looking at it closely, Skullius couldn’t help but feel weird.

Could he even eat this thing?

He was used to consuming food in his Hybrid Luman form but his Penetrator form? He hadn’t eaten anything as a skeleton!

Oh well!

He had already made a choice.

Skullius opened his mouth and bit on the head of the Chubby Remnant Child that retained its silent giggling and cheerful expression!

“AAAAAH! Master what are you doing?!” Yuyui screamed with extreme shock as she dashed towards Skullius.

Midway though, Ferex caught her and restrained her with his weight as he grew twice his size, numerous runes appearing over his body to boost his prowess!

Yuyui yelled and groaned as she pulled away from Ferex with ease, the strength from her blue core helping her overpower Ferex as she continued to rush towards Skullius with a firm grip extended from her fingers!

Once again, Ferex attempted to stop her, his body morphing into a large blanket that wrapped around her and firmly dug into the ground!

“Master, don’t you dare eat that child!” Yuyui screamed but Skullius ignored her as he munched on the Remnant Child’s head!

…!

The texture!

The softness!

Such a profound feeling it gave to Skullius’ teeth!

A dense amount of Null Life Essence blasted into Skullius’ mouth with an intense pressure, the Penetrator beginning to feeling less and less weird about eating the Remnant Child!

Slowly, he chewed the smiling Child’s head off and ground it into…. vicious blobs that soon turned into thick wisps of Null Life Essence that swirled around Skullius unlike how food usually descended down a gullet!

Yuyui continued to gnash her teeth and wrestle with Ferex but to no avail as she watched in horror, the Remnant Child get masticated into mush!

Soon, Skullius was saturated with a dense and unique type of Null Life Essence, his body emitting a bright blue light that teased Yuyui’s iris!

The Penetrator revelled in the feeling of this energy.

It was… definitely unique.

Nothing he had encountered so far held a semblance of a quality comparable to this energy and as Skullius checked his status to see if there was a change…

…!

It…it was real!

“It happened!” Skullius yelled.

This was phenomenon!

It had worked, against all his apprehension!

~~~

[ Luck : STUPENDOUSLY DESIRABLE (Temporary) ]

~~~

For the first time…

He had finally changed his luck from its atrocious tag to… STUPENDOUSLY DESIRABLE!

Skullius was excited.

So excited that his sockets were flooded with a bright flame as out of his mouth came a boisterous laugh with mana blaring out of him!

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! THIS IS FLESHING AMAZING! MY LUCK HAS CHANGED!”

This was a momentous occasion for the Penetrator!

Flesh Somanda!

At least for the limited one hour window!

A limited window that Skullius wasn’t going to waste!

It was time for evolution!

While ignoring Yuyui’s inflated cheeks and intense gaze, Skullius went on to focus on his long awaited evolution.

[You have broken past many hurdles and reached LV20. You are now able to evolve into the Second Tier of power. Do you accept?]

“Of course bro!” Skullius gave a reply.

Immediately, his vision darkened and he felt his will and consciousness dive out of his body and pass through what felt like a powerful barrier and disappear into a new space.

This sensation was familiar.

Ah… of course.

He had almost forgotten about this.

“Serenity…” Skullius said to the blue flame that stood flickering before his sight.

“It’s good to see you again, Skullius,” a sweet voice responded to the Null Lifeform’s consciousness.

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