Chapter 126 - A Warm Heart Inside A Cold Steel
Chapter 126 – A Warm Heart Inside A Cold Steel
"Wait, you're not disgusted?" Noah asked, full of surprise on his face.
"Disgusted? Why?" I frowned, acting I was truly confused. "This is 2016, and someone still thinks being gay is shameful? Oh, come on!"
Noah was stunned, he lowered his head, and I could see tears dropping on the floor.
His body was visibly shaken, and the tears streamed on his cheek before falling to the ground. I could hear his low sobs, he was holding a lot, and I couldn't do anything other than stay silent.
I wasn't someone who could sympathize easily. I mean, my heart was dead at this moment.
Nobody pitied me in my previous life, so I numbed my heart until it became a cold-hearted piece of terrible artwork shaped by torment, bullying, and many more.
But that didn't mean I was completely heartless. When I saw the struggle in Noah, I could see someone like me. Those who had been tormented to the edge of suicide.
Slowly, I stretched my arms and hugged Noah. He flinched the moment our warmth mingled into one, but he didn't refuse me either.
"Everything will be okay. There are people who will accept you for who you are," I said. I was telling him everything that I wanted to hear back then. I wished someone would do this to me, but nope.
I was all alone even in my last breath.
But it was quite ironic that I was the one telling someone about all these comforting words I wished to hear.
"You see, life is difficult, and both of us know that. But believe me, you will do just fine."
"But nobody wants me…." Noah murmured in agony. I could hear his pain. Maybe it took one tormented soul to know the other.
I sighed and patted his head, "I do. And I believe there'll be more people in the future. All you need to do is continue to continue living."
"Don't you want to see yourself in the future, free from all the stigma surrounding you?"
"I do…"
"Then you should stay alive and see what comes next, okay?"
"Emmy…"
"Hm?"
"How come you feel so warm? How do you know that I… I've been thinking about that…."
Well, because I knew you'd hang yourself a year from now, of course. Since we were entangled right now, I didn't want that to happen.
But I had to disagree about me being warm. I was just trying to be a decent human being here.
"I'm not warm," I denied curtly. I didn't want to be seen as weak, so I absolutely refused to be called 'warm.'
"You are…" Noah chuckled lightly. "I can feel that you have a good heart."
"Oh, stop with that nonsense, will you?"
"Nope, you're a warm person, Em," Noah insisted. "I can sense if someone has a good heart or not. You're warm…."
…
Oh well, if that was what he wanted to believe. I was definitely not a good or warm person.
In fact, I did believe that I was a terrible person, just like the rest of my bullies.
But at least, I didn't hurt anyone randomly just because. I returned back in time to avenge whoever wronged me.
I finally released him after he stopped crying. I was relieved when he gave me a thin smile.
"Thanks for accepting me, Emmy. I don't ask much from you, but can you help me with something?"
"Help?"
"Yeah."
"Sure, I guess…."
"Can you be my friend? I… I have no more friends. To have someone I can talk with will feel nice," Noah said.
…
Oh, that felt weird, I wouldn't lie. To have someone asking you to be his friend, I wasn't used to it.
Even with Cerise before, it was me who asked her to be my friend. She was my first and only friend for my whole high school life, but I didn't want to keep her in this life.
She wasn't worth all the trouble she brought into my life.
I paused for a moment, thinking about what profit would I get from befriending Noah Jameson.
Honestly, I didn't know much about him except for his case of suicide and bullying in my previous life.
…
Ah, fuck it! I didn't know if my move was correct or not, but I didn't have the heart to reject him.
"I can be your friend, sure," I answered.
"Can I join this club too? I don't have any club right now," Noah asked again. "Who is the club president? I'll ask for his permission and application letter."
"Uh… I don't think you can join for now," I said as I remembered that Logan hated anyone but me. I doubted he wanted any member here. "The club president is absent for a long time for… student exchange. So I'm technically the only one here, and I can't give you an application letter because I don't have the power to do so."
"Ah… that's unfortunate…." Noah looked sad again and lowered his head.
"But you can always come here, you know. I'm the only member. It would be nice to have someone here in my free time."
"Sure! I can come here every day if you want!" Noah said.
It was funny that he became a lot calmer around me, even though his face was still blue and bruised right now.
"Okay, I think this club has a first aid kit. Let me help you," I got up and searched for a first aid kit.
After finding it, I helped Noah by cleaning his wounds and patting his bruises with antiseptic. He winced a few times, but I forced him to bear with it.
I was quite proficient with the first aid kit since I usually helped clean the wounds and bruises made by my bullies.
"By the way, who beat you before?"
"Oh, they're from my grade. They're sophomores like me. I don't think you know them."
"Then you can just tell me freely since I have no affiliations with them, right?"
"… There are three people, including my ex-best friend. Thomas, Jorge, and Jackson. They're good friends, and I was Thomas' best friend. Well, that was what I thought because we known each other since childhood."
I was stunned the moment he told me about the names of that trio.
I knew those three because they were Barbara 'Barbie' Cornwell's goons.
Well, more like they were whipped for Barbie and had been fighting for her for their entire high school life.
It seemed that Barbie loved playing with their hearts though, they became blind, and when Barbie told them to beat me up because I was an eyesore… they did it ruthlessly.
Even more ruthless than Leah and her goons.
Because Leah's goons were influenced by drugs, so they beat me out of their hunger.
But these three men… not only did they beat me up badly. They also cut my hair forcefully, making bad patches here and there with scissors. Because Barbie wants proof that they did it.
So they cut my hair three times…
I thought I wouldn't be able to fight them until I got enough support.
But after knowing they also beat someone like Noah… I wouldn't lie that my blood boiled out of wrath.
The anger got the best of me and made me act out of impulse.
As I treated Noah's wound, I asked him, "Do you know about those two, Jorge and Jackson?"
"I do. Actually, I knew all of them because we lived in the same neighborhood. I was just closest with Thomas, Jorge and Jackson are just neighbor to me, nothing more."
"But you treated Thomas like your best friend?"
"Because our families were close, and his house was really close to mine. You know, childhood friend stuff…."
…
I didn't expect I'd find someone naive even after getting bullied to hell and back.
Did he really think Thomas still saw him as a friend? No wonder Thomas took that coming out moment from Noah terribly.
Well, it was done already, so we couldn't do much about it.
But it seemed that our interest could align with some words from me.
"Hey, do you want to stop the bullying from Thomas, Jorge, and Jackson?" I asked.
"Well, of course. I want them to stop, but can we do anyway?" He sighed deeply.
"Of course, there is always a way to solve anything. Since you can't ask them to treat you like a human being, how about we do something to them instead. You know that old saying, kill or be killed."
"Kill… or be killed? W—What do you mean, Em?" Noah looked scared with my proposal. Of course, any sane person would feel so wrong after hearing it.
"You know that you'll keep getting beaten until you graduate if you only let yourself be a sandbag for their interest," I had a small smirk on my face as I was ready to drop the bomb.
"How about we break their limbs, make sure they will never lay their hands on you anymore."