Chapter 126: In vino veritas
Chapter 126: In vino veritas
If one judged a success of a party by how drunk everyone present in it ended up be, then mine scored eight points out of ten. Everyone was just on the edge of the drunkenness where their bodies could still act decently well, but their minds were totally out of it. Everyone except for me. I, sadly, digested alcohol (as well as anything, really) too fast for it to affect me at all.
If creatures made from slime could get drunk at all.
Risha drank the least wine, but she was also the most lightweight of all people present. At first, Rosha tried to limit Risha’s wine consumption to just one cup, but that only forced out Risha’s rebellious streak.
The second place was Rosha’s—the woman knew how to relax when she gave herself to it. And I made sure that her cup was always full. Just everyone else’s, but hey, it was their choice to drink or not.
Yvenna didn’t restrict herself at all, but she also had a CON of a barbarian and an adventurer, which meant that she was resistant to alcohol the most. Even after all she drank, she didn’t waver in her movements or speech, unlike Rosha, whose coordination was noticeably slipping.
Each of girls were different drunks, too. Risha was a happy drunk—she smiled all the time, laughed a lot, and ended up chatting with the dancers and musicians. Yvenna was, just like Bishop warned me, an angry drunk… But I kept her in check. As in, I let her punch me and held her close and tight so she won’t reach for Rosha. Good thing I had four arms, or I wouldn’t have free arms to put food in my mouth.
And Rosha was a talkative drunk. Talkative, and as testy as she ever was. Of course, eventually her flood of complaints about everything that was wrong in the world went towards me, but I was really not expecting the turn it took.
“Voren, Voren. Just tell me, how dare you?” she asked, leaning closer to me with a scowl. “How. Daaare you?”
I raised my brows and looked at Rosha with amusement. “How dare I what?”
“How dare you be so hot!” she slapped her hand on the table, rattling the plates and splashing some wine from the cups. “You are damn demon. With all these, you know, uh… how they were called… Well, these things!” Rosha brought her palms together and made a mimed… something. Her fingers appeared to be refusing to listen. Finally, in frustration, Rosha slammed her palm on the table again. “They grow out of your back!”
“Wings?”
“Yeah, wings! And other stuff. And you are so slimy, and it’s, it’s… It should be disgusting, but it’s hot instead! All that smoothness, that slick feeling…” Rosha grabbed me by my arm, pressing into it with her chest. “I could’ve fucked you just now. See what you are turning me into? Stop it!”
“Yeah!” Yvenna joined from my other arm. “You are fucking Devourer, why the fuck you should be also so, so… this! I should fucking beat you for it! No, you should beat me for trying to beat you…” the dilemma of her dogma and her inner fury turned out to be too much for the girl’s brain—she ended her confusion by just punching me. “Stop being so hot!”
“Girls, girls, girls!” Risha moved towards us, smiling with a tipsy gleam in her eyes. “Stop fighting! Voren isn’t hot, he’s cool? Get it, get it? He’s cooool!” She giggled.
Rosha turned towards her sister with some effort. “Risha. Yes… keep thinking that. Never think that he’s hot.” She slowly nodded to herself, then turned towards Yvenna. “You mad cultist. Did you corrupt me into thinking that he’s hot? Is this all your fault?”
Yvenna bared her teeth. “Don’t you blame me! Devourer is amazing as he should be! We are his food… we are dirty, dirty sinners… we should be punished, we should…” she went off, then snarled, and then, all out of the sudden, bit me.
If I had my orichalcum armour morphed out, her teeth would’ve just slid over it, but I morphed it in because it limited my feeling of touch—and with a girl at each side I wanted that feeling enhanced, not the other way around.
Now I paid for it as Yvenna tore out a chunk of my flesh and swallowed it without chewing. The sheer audacity shocked me more than the pain I felt. Really, the pain was nothing on my comparative scale of pain—but the audacity!
Risha gasped, while Rosha, like me, just goggled at her. Yvenna laughed with an absolutely crazed expression of triumph.
“Yes! Fuck you, I did it! You say you can’t devour Devourer, but I just did!”
“Maybe you shouldn’t drink anymore…” Rosha muttered and blinked fast several times. “Wait, what if you get poisoned?”
Yvenna didn’t look poisoned, but she looked like a person in a dire need of a good cuff on her head. And a bucket of cold water to get rid of the excess drunkenness, I supposed. But… This was all so amusing. Other time, I would’ve set Yvenna down, but right now I really wanted to see what else would come into her crazy head. I even let go of her so she could stand up from the table if she wanted to.
She did just that, clenching her fists and looking around as if searching for an opponent. Her gaze made the slaves shrink in the places and Risha blink the same way her sister just did—cluelessly and drunkenly.
Finally, Yvenna stopped at Rosha, and her red eyes blazed with drunken fury. “I will test my new power on you! And then Devourer won’t fuck you anymore. He would fuck me, only my, but I won’t let him! I won’t let this dirty pervert!” She let out a bout of mad laughter. “I will tear you apart!”
Alright, so it went down to violence, just as expected. Now I had to stop her before she really tore Rosha apart.