Dual Cultivation

The Man Picked up by the Gods – Idle Talk 1

TL Note:

Edit: 2015/08/02 Fixed a few things here and there.

Idle Talk 1

A god in the form of a thin man was standing by himself in the divine realm when the three main gods appeared.

“Ah~… I’m tired…” [Rurutia]

“We finally got back.” [Kufo]

“Oh, if it isn’t Fer Noevir.” [Gayn]

“It’s quite rare for you to come out of your place.” [Rurutia]

The one who was standing was the god of magic, Fer Noevir. As well as the three gods, Gayn, Kufo, and Rurutia.

“Well, I was forcefully brought here, but I am also a little concerned.” [Fer Noevir]

“Forcefully?” [Gayn, Kufo, Rurutia]

Suddenly, 4 gods came out of nowhere, and Gayn’s group was surrounded.

“Eh? Wait, what’s with this situation?” [Kufo]

“Why are we being surrounded?” [Rurutia]

“Aren’t you going to explain yourselves?” [Gayn]

One god stepped out. It was Tekun.

“You dare ask with your hands in your chest? I won’t let you say you don’t know, Gayn.”

“Why are you suddenly mad?” [Gayn]

“Now, now, calm down for a bit, Tekun-san. If you push them like that, we won’t be able to talk.” [Willieris]

“Exactly. You should calm down, and drink some alcohol or something.” [Grimp]

The two gods who remonstrated Tekun are the goddess of land and harvest, Willieris, and the god of farming and livestock, Grimp. These two are particularly gentle amongst the different gods. The Goddess of Land and Harvest looked like a refined, middle-aged woman. While the God of Farming and Livestock was a middle-aged man with a hoe on his shoulder. These two gods are husband and wife.

Although Tekun wasn’t in a good mood after being remonstrated, he kept quiet, and drank wine while he settled down. With Grimp by her side, Willieris explained.

“The reason we’re acting like this is because we heard that you three went off to a different world to play. The first one who heard this was Tekun, and since he also wanted to waste some time, he got mad.” [Willieris]

Fer Noevir interjected.

“In order to find you three, Tekun eveｎ called out to Willieris and Grimp to get me to use my power.” [Fer Noevir]

“Come to think of it, you even used your power to prevent Tekun from going into your place, right?” [Rurutia]

“His craft aside, he’s rough and irresponsible. He does nothing but drink wine and make noise. He’s a nuisance.” [Fer Noevir]

“Hey! You bastards! I can hear you, you know!?” [Tekun]

“Ｉt’s not like you have any business at my place. And it’s not like you’re the only one not permitted to enter either. Anyway, enough of that. What were you thinking going to a different world just to play?” [Fer Noevir]

“Wait a moment, who told you that?” [Rurutia]

Tekun answered Rurutia’s question.

“Drop the act, I heard it from Ryouma. Didn’t Kufo tell him so? I thought he was lying at the time so I read his mind, but apparently he wasn’t.” [Tekun]

“Oops–… I told him not to tell other humans, but I forgot to mention that he shouldn’t tell it to the other gods too…” whispered Kufo as he slapped his forehead. After that, chairs, arranged in a circle, appeared out of nowhere and the three gods decided to talk about it while they all sat.

“Now, can you start talking? Or rather, you should have taken me with you!” [Tekun]

“That you went there for fun aside, we really can’t ignore the fact that you’ve been going to another world frequently.” [Willieris]

“Mind explaining yourselves?” [Grimp]

“Right, actually… We came there to check up on the God of Earth.” [Gayn]

“We talked about it before remember? That thing about Ryouma’s supposed happiness being stolen by the God of Earth.” [Rurutia]

“Right, I do remember being surprised that a god would actually do something forbidden like that.” [Tekun]

“So because of that, we decided to go check.” [Kufo]

“Eh? You didn’t go there to play?” [Tekun]

“We haven’t told Ryouma about the fact that the God of Earth stole his happiness, so I gave him an excuse.” [Kufo]

When Tekun heard that, his anger quickly simmered down.

“Oh… so that’s what it was.” [Tekun]

“Tekun, you don’t get mad except for things regarding fun, huh?’ [Fer Noevir]

“It’s still plenty a problem to be frequently going to a different world, you know?” [Willieris]

Fer Noevir and Willieris was shocked at Tekun's reaction.But Fer Noevir, quickly regaining his composure, asked Gayn’s group a question.

“Won’t there be a problem if you keep on doing that?” [Fer Noevir]

“There won’t be a problem but…” [Gayn]

“It’s quite difficult to go there without getting caught.” [Kufo]

“We haven’t been seen so far, but the god on the other side is acting strange… While it’s not the same as with Ryouma’s, even until now, that god has been taking other people’s happiness. But the really strange thing is that he doesn’t seem to be using it for anything.” [Rurutia]

“At first we thought he was giving something to his believers, but that didn’t seem to be the case at all. He’s just stealing as he pleases without giving it to anyone.” [Gayn]

“The management of the world is also sloppy. The people there may no longer have much to develop in terms of technology, but… even though we went through all the trouble of sneaking in because of the rule of not getting involved in other worlds, anticlimactically, we were able to get in really easily. We looked so stupid for trying not to get caught.” [Kufo]

“We even thought there might be a trap, but in the end, there was nothing. With that kind of management, he wouldn’t even be able to respond if a demon king from a different world were to attack.” [Gayn]

“He’s that sloppy? If that’s so, then he’s no longer doing his job as a god, is he?” [Fer Noevir]

“That might actually be the case…” [Gayn]

“To begin with, what on earth is he planning to do with all that happiness he’s stealing? That kind of thing is useless to us, gods.” [Grimp]

“Well it’s also possible to use it to preserve our strength when the people lose faith in us… but if the world is safe, then a god’s power shouldn’t go below the minimum power needed. So what is he doing with it?” [Willieris]

“It’s certainly true that the Japanese of that world has less faith than the people of this world, but the humans of the other countries of that world have strong faith. Hence, there still shouldn’t be any problem. There’s also the issue with that world’s environment and the nature there is getting rough, but there’s still no reason to run out of power. And it’s precisely because of that, that we’re sending magic power here from that world.” [Gayn]

“That’s certainly true. I made a foolish question. But if that’s the case, then there really isn’t any reason for him to steal happiness. Exactly what is that god using it for?” [Fei Noevir]

All of the sudden, the god that hadn’t said a word until now opened her mouth.

“… Does the reason really matter? We don’t do things like stealing people’s happiness, so we may not know, but because of that isn’t it possible that there actually is a way to use it? Isn’t that enough? Then, all that’s left is for us to beat that god if he comes here picking a fight.” [God]

“Kirilel, you’re saying that kind of simple thing again… You’re a muscle-brain as usual I see. Really, a woman like you…” [Fer Noevir]

With a forged body, an armor, and a sheathed sword at her waist, the one who proclaimed that was the God of War, Kirilel. Her body is well trained, but there are also parts that are supple. Her manner of talking is like that of a man, but she is a full-fledged goddess.

“Who is a muscle-brain!? Even I can use my head!” [Kirilel]

“The only thing you use your head for is for fighting techniques!” [Fer Noevir]

“Exactly! But even then, it doesn’t change the fact that I’m using my head! In fact, isn’t this way healthier than someone like you, who does nothing but isolate himself in his place?” [Kirilel]

“What does health have to do with a god, when our bodies are indestructible?” [Fer Noevir]

These two gods have opposing personalities, so whenever they meet, things usually end up like this. Before things got worse, Gayn interjected and asked Kirilel a question.

“Let’s put that discussion aside for now, Kirilel why are you here? You weren’t called by Tekun, right?” [Gayn]

“What are you talking about, gramps? I am the God of War, you know? Where there is conflict there is war. And where there is war, so am I! I came here because I felt Tekun’s anger, and after listening to his story, I found out that gramps and the others went to play in the other world. So I’ve been waiting here quietly because I thought we’d be giving an execution.” [Kirilel]

“There’s no need!” [Gayn]

“That’s not something to joke about!” [Kufo]

“You’re a god, so you can normally kill us, right!?” [Rurutia]

“There’s no need to worry. I won’t do anything this time. I understand that the God of Earth is acting weird. And because of him, something strange happened with the soul of that guy, Ryouma. Ryouma isn’t someone who’d thoughtlessly wreak havoc, so it’s fine. But if he was someone dangerous, then the situation would have become terrible.

From now on there’s a possibility that the souls we bring here might be abnormal. You understand why we need to be wary of that, right? But of course, I won’t do anything either as long as the God of Earth doesn’t attack the world here.” [Kirilel]

The God of War, Kirilel, is the strongest amongst the gods when it comes to fighting. Because of this, she is the god who brings harm to the people of the world, and is also the god who protects the world from its enemies. Hence, she is also known as the God of Judgment.

She rarely has any work to do as the God of Judgment. But if the humans were to do something that would bring great harm to the world, the one to bestow judgment will mostly be her.

And while strange, it would appear that she also became the judge for the sins of the three gods. Gayn and the others do not specialize in fighting, so winning against her is impossible. Moreover, despite both being gods, if she went full force she would also be able to destroy all three of them.

But of course, they wouldn’t disappear. But they would still end up quite hurt. So because of that they were quite relieved when they heard Kirilel’s words.

“This is bad for the heart…” [Rurutia]

“I think my lifespans just shortened…” [Kufo]

“Please don’t scare old people too much…” [Gayn]

“Gods don’t need to worry about hearts and lifespans though. Well, in any case, it doesn’t seem like I’m needed here, so I’ll be taking my leave. There are still some people who are continuing to fight, so I’m quite busy compared to you guys.” [Kirilel]

“Right, sorry.” [Tekun]

“It’s not like you called me here, I just came on my own. Also, Gayn, Kufo, Rurutia, keep it moderate, ok? You guys going to the other world.” [Kirilel]

“Right…” [Gayn]

“That’s true.” [Kufo]

“Let’s alternate from now on.” [Rurutia]

“You’re not going to stop?” [Kirilel]

“But I still haven’t…” [Rurutia]

Halfway through her speech, Tekun interjected.

“Still haven’t? What is that, ‘still haven’t’?” [Tekun]

“Oh, nothing in particular.” [Rurutia]

“There’s no need to understand the god on the other side.” [Kufo]

“Right, right.” [Gayn]

Gayn’s group acted unconcerned, but then Willieris asked a question.

“Are you guys still hiding something?” [Willieris]

At those words, Tekun once more emanated a dangerous aura.

“Did you bastards really go there to investigate the God of Earth?” [Tekun]

“That’s right.” [Rurutia]

“But of course.” [Gayn]

“We investigated the god on the other side, you know?” [Kufo]

“Even now he’s still stealing happiness from his people, so that’s not a lie. Then in that case, I’ll change the question. Did you do anything else aside from investigating?” [Tekun]

The three gods stiffened.

“What’s the matter? Kufo, didn’t you tell Ryouma that you went sightseeing in Earth?” [Tekun]

“Well, that’s because we were looking for the people who had their happiness taken away. Because of that we ended up seeing some places. Calling something like that, ‘sightseeing’, is a misunderstanding, you know?” [Kufo]

“In other words, you thought that you could go sightseeing.” [Fer Noevir]

At Fer Noevir’s words, Kufo was surprised and his body shook.

“Wait a moment, isn’t that a leading question!?” [Kufo]

“Kufo, you know if you say something like that, then you’re basically admitting that you took the opportunity to sightsee while looking for people.” [Grimp]

At Kufo’s words, Grimp whispered that. And once again, Tekun’s aura became dangerous as he asked Gayn.

“Gayn, I don’t understand it well, but I heard that you got hooked to something called, ‘idol’.” [Tekun]

“In Earth, idols are experts who dance and sing. You can see them often from the boxes that show reflections on Earth called TV. You can also see them downtown if you have the chance to meet them. But, don’t misunderstand, ok? It’s not like I went out of my way to see them.” [Gayn]

“Song and dance, huh? Then in that case, this world also has it. It’s not really something…” [Tekun]

While Tekun quickly calmed down when he heard the words ‘song' and 'dance’, this time Gayn’s eyes sharpened, and he flared up at Tekun.

“Don’t group idols with the things from this world!! The idols of Earth are cute and diligent!! Whenever I see them, I can’t help but want to cheer them on!!” [Gayn]

“Ah, ahh?” [Tekun]

Tekun couldn’t help but falter before that menacing look. But at that moment, Gayn noticed his mistake, and it showed on his face. Seeing that Willieris said this.

“Seeing you this serious about those so called idols, I think I understand perfectly well what’s going on now.” [Willieris]

Tekun’s gaze moved towards Rurutia. Having realized that the ruse is up, Rurutia answered before Tekun could even ask her.

“As for me I just ate some sweet things during break time while we were moving on Earth, you know?” [Rurutia]

At that, Tekun’s anger and the Gayn trio’s shriek roared throughout the divine realm.