Dysfunctional – An Assassin’s Guide to Reincarnating in Another World

Chapter 166 - 165 - Counterattack(Part 4)



Chapter 166 – 165 – Counterattack(Part 4)

Point-of-View: Azyl Roake

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Hm…I think I would have liked to be as assassin. Sneaking up to someone and killing them was a lot less work than fighting them head-on. Kuro said that it was an actual profession in his old world…in this world, assassinations did happen, of course, but they were rare, and there were no ‘professionals’ who carried it out. Honestly, before I met Kuro, the word ‘assassin’ was synonymous with ‘common thug’ to me. Typically just lowlives paid by rich people to kill people they didn’t like, or so I’ve heard, anyway.

So, naturally, I had never considered becoming an assassin. But in a different world, assassins were professional killers who could get paid large amounts of money…if there had been a system in this world for assassins to get trained and become paid professionals like Adventurers were, I’d easily pick being an assassin over an Adventurer. The whole point of an assassin was doing things without being noticed…that sounded perfect.

Don’t mind me, I’m just occupying my mind with fleeting and random thoughts to distract myself from how tired I was…I was using Ice Magic to cool down my legs and joints to keep them from aching…hm, speaking of which, I could use a joint right now. Anyway, I got into this particular train of thought when I recalled that when I freeze someone in a block of ice, if I focus the freezing to the inside of their bodies till they’re at the exact same temperature as the ice encasing them…then shattering the ice will shatter them too.

And I just needed to meet one condition to pull it off, to sneak up to the target without being noticed and touch them briefly. Once that was done, they were as good as dead. I just needed to snap my fingers, and both the ice and the target inside the ice would shatter. It had been fifteen hours since this began, and in case I didn’t already mention it, I was really tired.

I had come across and killed two Vampires so far, using the method I’d just described. While I can react quickly against those faster than me, since my eyes are very sensitive to motion and movement, I’m not very fast myself, physically speaking. And I can’t use Skate because I can’t figure out how to maintain my balance with that technique, and I don’t like running.

I was walking through the houses and buildings, since this way, I’d barely be exposed to any sunlight at all, which meant less sweating. Plus some of the houses had Cooling Crystals active, so that was nice. Hm, I’ve been moving for about four hours without a rest now, even with my ice cooling me down, I needed a break.

I walked into a house that felt nice and cool, and decided to take about half an hour to rest, forming some cool water in my mouth and gulping it down with a sigh. So far, this’ll be my fourth half-hour break, I’d have liked to take more breaks, but even I can’t slack off in this situation.

Oh, it sounds like the people who live here are coming downstairs. This is a bit awkward, but so long as they can’t see me, it’s fine. I glanced at the large clock in the room…it was a bit past 10 AM, guess they were about to have their breakfast. I had already had some fruits and buns from the house I rested in during my last break, so I’m not hungry right now.

Looks like a family with two kids. Both children looked carefree and playful, while their parents had more worried expressions on their faces. Can’t blame them, they are currently being ruled by monsters who feed on their life force, after all.

Almost on cue, the front door suddenly swung open and two Vampires walked in. Seriously? What a pain. You have got to be kidding me…of all the houses in this area, of all the houses in this country…

“I have not fed on human life force for some time, and there are four ripe for the picking here,” Remarked one of them, before adding, “Hm, although two appear to be children, how disappointing.”

“Oh, I disagree, human life force is best when young.”

The family was cowering by the corner of the room, fear in the eyes of the parents and the children looked like they were about to cry.

“Please, I beg you…take my life but spare my family,” Begged the man with a tone of desperation.

Okay, I suppose I should step in.

“And why should we listen to a human like yourself-?”

“It doesn’t matter, because either way, you two are dead!” Came a voice from behind them, before I could take down my Stealth barrier.

Wait, isn’t she…

“What? And who are you?”

“Oh, I’m just a crazy bitch passing through, and I’m gonna tear you to shreds! Finally, I found some Vampires to rip apart!”

I think her name was…Kuua? What is she doing? It doesn’t look like she’s planning to use the barrier to fight them.

“Hah, you believe a mere human is a match for two Vampires?”

“Why don’t you come at me and find out?” She taunted with a lick of her lips.

This is not good, I can’t let her fight them when she has no intention of doing so covertly. Time for me to step in. I moved in behind the two Vampires and deactivated my Stealth barrier, before placing my hands on their shoulders and freezing them…

“Why don’t we all just cool off?” I remarked with a sigh, instantly regretting the uncreative pun I just made, before snapping my fingers as I froze them enough, “Now, then…Shatter.”

I won’t ever directly admit this to Kuro or Rai, but…I liked naming my attacks too. I called this one Shatter.

“Wha-…woah, how’d you do that?” Exclaimed Kuua in awe, “That was so cool! Oh, an unintentional pun, cool! Oops, I did it again…heh, nice, Britney reference.”

Huh? I’m guessing that’s a ‘reference’ that only Reincarnators would understand.

“What do you think you’re doing? Did you forget that we can’t be discovered?” I sighed in exasperation.

“Well, no, but…that’s so boring, and besides, I’m sure a few loud fights won’t do any harm, right?”

Hm, this is not good, she is not someone that should be allowed to run free…shouldn’t the others from The Empire have known about this? It would be pointless, and take too much effort, to convince her to do things more subtly. Therefore…

“Go to sleep for a bit,” I remarked, walking over to her and encasing her in ice before she could react, before pressing a spell against her, “And now, Store. I’ll let you out once I get to the rendezvous point…well, not that you can hear me right now.”

I brought a set of Store and Extract spells with me since I thought they might be useful, there were a few spare copies leftover from the ones used to hold the attacks that were used for the diversionary attack, so I figured why not?

If there’s one positive for all this walking, it’s that I’m getting some good new spell ideas…like a teleport spell that, instead of teleporting from one fixed point to another, teleports the user a certain amount of distance in the direction that the user points the spell in…imagine how much walking I could avoid with a spell like that. I just point in the direction I want to go and I’m there. Hm, I’ll have to add command lines to take into account certain factors, for example, I don’t want to end up inside a wall or something. Anyway, I should get going. I’ll take my rest somewhere else.

“Um, excuse me…thank you so much!” Said the father of the family.

“Oh, uh…no problem. And…sorry for entering your house without permission,” I replied, before reactivating my Stealth barrier.

I still have a long way to go…better get moving…I’m still kinda tired though…

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Point-of-View: Tirayze Valaque

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I want…I want to be…I want to be the first one to reach the goal! That’s what I’d decided from the start, and as soon as this thing began and we all went through the walls, I shot forward as fast as I could. I want to be the first person to get to the rendezvous point, and no one can stop me!

Well, that’s what I thought, but…this has been, like, super boring so far. I didn’t have a stopwatch on me, as in I kinda maybe lost the one I was given, but it’s fine, I was able to keep track of the time by peeking into houses and checking out their clocks. The last time I checked, it had been a little past 1 PM, which meant that it had been about nineteen hours since this attack started.

So, why did I want to be the first to reach the rendezvous point? Two reasons. First, because I’m the strongest human in this world, so it should be only natural. And second…because I wanted to greet whoever showed up after me with something along the lines of ‘what took you so long’ or ‘it’s about time someone else showed up’ or something like that, I’ve always wanted to do something like that!

And that second reason was what was mainly keeping me going at this pace, otherwise I’d have probably slowed down already. I had taken a few short breaks whenever I felt myself getting tired, but I’ve always had a lot of stamina, so-…well, okay, not ‘always’, technically only after I manifested multiple Elemental Magic types, but the specifics aren’t important.

Also, I had to say…this Stealth barrier spell is pretty awesome. I was invisible, no one could hear my footsteps or any noise I made at all, and I could walk through walls. As for the other barrier, I think they called it the Stealth Fighting Ring barrier…I hadn’t gotten the chance to use it yet.

I’d covered a lot of distance at a pretty good pace, but I was yet to run into a single Vampire. I had entered the upper-class area of Silvland a couple of hours ago, so it shouldn’t be too long before I make it to the church where we were all supposed to meet up. But, come on, seriously…how could I have not run into even a single Vampire yet!?

Hm, what’s that? I could have sworn I saw a dim flash of red from inside a window of the mansion I was passing by…could it be…? I stopped and walked towards the entrance, the front door wide open…yes, it had to be…! I entered the mansion with a sense of anticipation, walking in and looking around…I hear crying, might as well follow after the noise…

I walked through the walls, straight in the direction the noise was coming from…bingo! Seven people were in here, a couple with three kids and two slaves. And more importantly, one Vampire.

“P-please, just take the slaves, spare us! We shall provide you with any number of slaves to feed on if you-!” Begged the man, tears running down his face.

“Hah, I do not need to be provided with anything, I shall simply take what I want,” Laughed the Vampire, before firing a Blood Magic blast at the man’s leg, scorching it badly.

Huh, all five members of the family who lived here had scorch marks all over them, but the slaves didn’t have any, though I wouldn’t exactly call them unscathed, they had plenty of bruises and whip marks on them.

“Y-you do not need to consume all of us, surely? So-.”

“That is correct, I do not need to…but I do want to,” Sneered the Vampire, before blasting the man’s face, who let out a choked cry and passed out, literally pissing himself, “Tch, how disgusting, I almost do not want to consume your life force.”

This is…this is awesome! I get to watch these filthy rich snobs get tortured to death, after which I’ll get to fight this Vampire? I definitely wasn’t bored anymore, haha! The Vampire pierced his tail into the man’s shoulder and lifted him up, before plunging his claws into his chest and draining his life force, tossing away the lifeless corpse as he finished. He then turned his attention to the mother and children.

“S-stay away, monster! You will suffer God’s divine wrath, filthy creature- arghhhhh!” She began hysterically with the cross of the Silvland church in her hand, before screaming in pain as the Vampire blasted her hand off, along with the cross.

So this was a family of religious nuts, huh, I’m going to enjoy watching them suffer. The children were holding crosses too, tears running down their faces…naturally, I have no intention of saving them. I mean, setting aside the fact that I decided to be the villain of this world, children or not, I have no sympathy to those who blindly cling to religion just because they’re too weak to do anything on their own…I went through hell in this world for years, and I certainly got no help from God or religion…no, everything I am today is directly due to my own efforts and nothing more.

So seeing people put their unreasonable and desperate hopes in religion pissed me off, I bet these kids believe that if they pray hard enough, God will save them or some bullshit like that. In a way, I am helping them…after all, I know for a fact that death isn’t the end of everything, reincarnation comes after…so, you know, this could be a great learning experience for their next lives…no matter how hard things get, it doesn’t change the fact that God doesn’t exist.

Or who knows, maybe he does exist…either way, he isn’t going to answer your prayers, miracles like that don’t exist, the only miracles that exist are the ones you make yourself. I’ve had enough experience with religion to know that better than anyone.

In my old world, I’d had a relatively normal life upto a certain point, when my parents inadvertently got involved with a religious group that turned out to be a sick cult. The were brainwashed into becoming devout believers, and after that, my father was turned into a mindless sheep, while my mother become a whore for the high-ranking members to play with. Oh, and I suffered the same fate as she did, while I was only fifteen.

Eventually, I managed to escape and live a somewhat normal life for a few years, but the cult hunted me down and burnt me at the stake for running away…heh, just so we’re clear, that was in 2018, not the Middle Ages. And then I got reincarnated in this world…to be honest, most of the time I spent in this world before I was sold to the Magic Research Group is a blur, but I remember being a slave to a religious noble…was it in Platinberg? Yes, I think so, but I’m not sure…like I said, it’s kind of a blur.

I won’t get into the specifics, but let’s just say I suffered at the hands of that nobleman…a lot. And he used to babble on and on about religion like a broken record, it made me feel like I was going crazy. After all that, the topic of religion was a touchy one for me…even the mention of it could make my blood boil and piss me off to practically an irrational extent.

Hm, got a bit off-track from the matter at hand there, let’s get back to the present situation…oh, looks like the Vampire just finished consuming the life force of the mother. That left the three kids, who were holding their crosses in front of themselves, pointing them at the Vampire with fear and hatred in their eyes.

“D-disgusting m-monster! Y-your existence i-is an affront to G-God, we are the chosen ones, you will incur God’s wrath!”

Jesus fucking Christ, that kid looked like he was ten at most, and he was that much of a religious nut already? He’s too far gone, he deserves to die…

“So loud and obnoxious, you humans who give yourselves false hope through the meaningless practice known as religion. If a being that punished all wrong-doing truly existed, you humans would be the first to suffer his wrath. The many, many sins of your ancestors against the other races, the conflicts amongst yourselves over trivial matters such as varying beliefs…and most ludicrous of all, you are a race that enslave and abuse your own, how truly pitiful,” Laughed the Vampire, nodding at the slaves, “You humans are worthless existences…except for one value, you serve as excellent nourishment and sustenance to us Vampires.”

Damn, this Vampire out here spitting facts. Also, what did he mean by ‘other races’? Was he talking about monsters, maybe?

“The words of a blasphemous monster will not sway our beliefs!”

Fucking sheep.

“Hm, is that so? Well, it matters not, the fact that you are about to die here will not change. I have held myself back long enough, the life force of human children is quite the delicacy to some Vampires, including myself. Now, then, where do I start?”

Okay, I want to rile this Vampire up, so I should prevent him from consuming their life forces, since he so clearly was craving it…but I have no intention of saving the lives of these sheep. Oh, I know, I’ll just kill two birds with one stone, duh! I deactivated the Stealth barrier and swirled water, wind and lightning at the tip of my index fingers.

“Take this, Death Cyclone Bullet…bang, bang, bang!” I smirked, as I fired three compressed spheres of the triple-Elemental combo…aimed at the heads of the three kids, painting the wall behind them with their blood and brains as I blasted the top of their heads off.

“What the-!? Where did you come from!?” Exclaimed the Vampire, stumbling away, before growling, “How dare you…I was looking forward to savoring their life force!”

“Heh, my bad, my bad…want me to kill you too?” I inquired before activating the barrier around us, trapping him in with me, “Oh, my mistake, let me rephrase that…I’m going to kill you too.”

“You bastard-!” He yelled, zipping towards me with his claws extended.

“How convenient, this place had a tiled floor,” I observed, before raising several spikes from the floor as he neared me, piercing into him and immobilizing him, “I wouldn’t have been able to do this if it’d been a wooden floor.”

“Who…are…y-?”

“Ooh, I know what we can do! Let’s see how many Death Cyclone Bullets it takes me to hit your core! And by all means, feel free to heal yourself, you’ll just be fusing yourself onto the spikes even tighter!”

“N-no, stop-!”

.

.

.

.

.

Seventeen.

That’s how many shots I had to fire before I finally hit his core. Ahh, that was a nice escape from boredom, I feel refreshed and ready to continue heading on! I deactivated the barrier with a happy sigh and took in a deep breath, the scent of fresh death heavy in the room. Oh, right, the slaves…hm, do I kill them too?

“Hey, you two,” I addressed the two terrified and confused-looking slaves, “Tell me, do you worship the God of Silvland?”

They looked unsure of what to say, looking at me warily. Well, I had just disappeared right in front of their eyes along with the Vampire, and then reappeared out of nowhere. Guess they need a little push.

“Answer me or I’ll kill you. Do you believe in, and/or, worship God?”

“No…I do not believe he exists,” Said one of them, “Because if he truly did, why must we suffer like this?”

“And you?” I asked the other one.

“I…think he may exist. And if he does, I curse his existence. If God truly wishes that only his ‘chosen people’ can live easy lives, then I would prefer there to be no God than a God like that to exist.”

Yes, that’s right, this is the exact attitude you need to have towards religion and God!

“I see…you both pass, I won’t kill you! Oh, one more thing…you’re not pissed about me not saving your masters, and then killing their kids, are you?”

“No, not at all…for that, we gratefully thank you. Those children were monsters, as were their parents. As I expected to die, my only solace was the satisfaction that I got to see them suffer and die first.”

“Good answer! Oh, crap, I should go, I still need to be the first! Later, slaves!” I exclaimed cheerfully, with a friendly wave.

As I reactivated my Stealth barrier, I couldn’t help but wonder…had I done a good deed just now? Hm, that’s not good, I need to be more villain-y. Eh, who cares, I enjoyed myself, and that’s all that really matters. Let’s just say that what I did way morally gray for now…

Huh…as it turned out, I reached the rendezvous point like twenty minutes after that. I hope no one else has arrived yet! I walked in through the walls of the building and looked around…doesn’t look like anyone’s here yet, but someone might have arrived and hadn’t taken down their Stealth barrier yet…for that matter, I hadn’t taken mine down yet either.

Oh, maybe I can find them using Lightning Sensory Field…I could only use it at a range of a hundred meters max, lightning was definitely the hardest of the Elemental Magic types to master, and I wasn’t too great with lightning techniques. Huh, I’m sensing somebody upstairs…just one person. Crap, had someone else arrived before me, after all!? No, wait, it felt like they were hiding…maybe it was someone else.

Well, only one way to find out. With my Stealth barrier still activate, I headed up the stairs and walked towards the spot I was sensing…there were a bunch of boxes filled with dusty books stacked on top of each other. Wow, was that supposed to be a hiding place? It was so obvious.

I walked around the wall of boxes and peered in…a woman was hiding there, looking half asleep. Oh, there’s some empty food ration containers and water bottles too. And that outfit…holy crap, she’s a nun!

“Hey, you there. You alive?” I inquired, shutting off the barrier.

“Wha…? Wh-who are you-…oh, thank goodness, you’re a human!”

I’ve, uh, always had a thing for nuns since way back in my old world. And as this one stood up and dusted herself off, I could see that she had some pretty great curves…nice!

“Mhm, I’m as human as they get!” I replied with a grin.

How should I play this, tell her I’ll save her if she, you know, plays with me? No, that was kinda like blackmail, and I don’t want to be a creepy-type villain…hm, I need to figure out a way to make her want me without pressuring her into it, but how-…

“My prayers were answered! God sent me a savior, it’s a divine miracle- ahh!” She began with teary eyes, before I interrupted her by grabbing her throat and lifting her up.

Damn it, what a letdown. This must be how doctors feel when they save a patient’s life and the patient thanks God for it. No, I guess it was my fault for not seeing past the fantasy, stupid, stupid me…in reality, nuns were…

“Ahh, how disappointing. Of course a fucking nun is going to be a religious fanatic, what was I thinking? But that’s not even the worst of it, you called me a savior sent by God…so, basically, you’re saying that I’m nothing more than a pawn to God. And there is no such thing as divine miracles…grr, damn, I’m so fucking pissed off! And disappointed too, on top of all that, you ruined my longtime nun fantasy…guess there’s no other choice…die, bitch.”

I activated the Stealth barrier around us as she began screaming in pain, as I roasted her alive. I formed a pool of water under her to prevent any flames from burning up the floor…probably shouldn’t leave any trace of her death, so I’ll burn her entire body until she turns to ashes, and I’ll use this water under it to collect the ashes and dump it in the toilet.

Hm, this is kinda slow…she’s already dead now, but it’ll take a while to completely turn her body into ash…ooh, I know, what if I add some lightning to the mix? Nice, it’s working, she’s getting incinerated a lot faster now!

It didn’t take long after that to reduce the corpse to ash, after which I collected the ashes and threw it into a toilet using the water I used to gather the ashes. Okay, now to deal with the smell…I used Wind Magic to accomplish that. Sure is convenient having all five Elemental Magic types!

Now, I just need to wait for the others to arrive. I wonder how long it’s been since we started? I let out a slight yawn and sighed…I know that I have large reserves of stamina to tap into, but traveling almost nonstop for about a day was still pretty tiring. Plus I didn’t get much sleep before this thing began, I was too excited and couldn’t fall asleep.

Before I knew it, I had dozed off on one of the benches on the first floor, getting some much-needed rest. Not sure how long I was out for, but it would have been even longer if someone hadn’t shaken me awake at some point…I woke up to a slightly darker surroundings than when I fell asleep…looks like the sun is beginning to set. Wait, who woke me…?

“Oh, you’re awake, Lord Valaque. When did you get h-?” Began a familiar figure with a bushy tail.

“Huh, Azeria…? Er, I mean…hmph, it’s about time someone else showed up, I was starting to think-…ahhh, forget it, I missed my opportunity,” I sighed remorsefully, “First my nun fantasy ruined and now this…man, today has really sucked, I don’t deserve such bad luck…”

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