Chapter 302 Blooming of unknown feelings(2)
Chapter 302 Blooming of unknown feelings(2)
Ying Sheng's business plan for her bakery gradually to blur in front of her eyes as she stared at her laptop screen for continuous minutes. She blinked her eyes a few times and gave her head a shake, trying to jar herself and hoping that some inspiration would strike her.
She couldn't estimate how long she had been sitting in her room, attempting to put some more work into the project that she needed to pass in order to finish the semester.
Usually, just the thought of failing and thinking about how her parents would react was enough to kick her into gear to get her work done. She longed for her parents' approval for so long, wishing that they would at least notice her and the hard work that she did. However, they dismissed her, and the fear of falling short didn't do the trick anymore.
She was still a little hungover from last night, which didn't do her any favors right now, but at least she had some fun with her friends. She had been so happy when Liam agreed to team up with her to play Connect Four. He typically shied away from drinking games, which she didn't blame him for. Things could get crazy. Regrettable actions were made. She almost committed one last night.
When they were walking and talking about him and his history with girls and kisses, she had almost strayed too far into territory that was anything but platonic. It wasn't that she wanted to stay away from that area, but she was worried about darkening his world.
Sure, they lived together and he was aware of some of the things that haunted her, but she withheld a lot from him. She didn't spill it all to him, and she was afraid to. It would feel like she was passing on a curse and changing his perspective on her.
She wouldn't be seen as fun and spontaneous. She would be seen as crushed and spiraling. Despite that being true, she didn't want him to see her as that. There were glimpses of the true version of her that came out when they were together, and if anyone was going to bring her back to herself, it would be him.
Why would she put that pressure on him, though? How she felt and how she reacted was her own doing. That was on her, and she didn't feel nearly important enough to crawl to Liam for help. She probably didn't deserve it in the first place.
Liam embodied so much of what she wanted to be, including smart, funny, and sweet. He deserved every ounce of love that he received. His parents didn't turn their back on him. His friends loved him for who he was, and she wished that she could get closer to his warm and welcoming spirit.
Ying Sheng couldn't bring herself to ruin what they had going for them, not over her own emotions. He had so much to worry about with work and seeing his family, and she wasn't about to disrupt his life. She cared about him too much for that. She wanted the best for him, which meant she couldn't ransack his life with her own issues.
After a few more minutes of silence and stillness, a sigh broke from her as she shut her laptop, figuring she could try again later. She was tired of being stuck in her room for so long. Her eyes automatically shifted to her bedroom door. She knew who was beyond it, and that thought made her forget about everything else for a few blissful seconds.
Maybe she shouldn't bother him, but she couldn't deny the appeal of seeing him and talking to him. It sounded way better than isolating herself in her room and reminding herself of the lack of work that she had done. She eventually broke down and headed out of her bedroom, venturing down the hall to Liam's bedroom, where he always kept the door cracked, like he welcomed her to pop in whenever.
"Knock knock," she called out as she lightly pushed the door open to step into the dark room. The only way she could see him was through the LED light strips surrounding his room and the lights flashing from his computer.
Liam pulled his black headset off as he tore his eyes from his large computer monitor, a first person shooter game playing on the screen. A smile immediately crossed his face when he spotted her, prompting him to turn in his blue and black gaming chair to face her.
"Hey, what's up?" He asked her.
Ying Sheng didn't have any good excuse for why she was in his room besides just wanting his company. He always made her feel at least a little bit better and distracted her thoughts from whatever was bothering her. She swore that it had to be some sort of superpower.
"Came to bother you for a little bit," Ying Sheng told him as she strode into the room, perking herself up as she stopped beside his gaming chair.
"You never bother me," Liam assured her as he reached out to pause his game, shifting his focus to her.
That was nice of him to say. Ying Sheng hoped that he meant it. He was so nice that she couldn't help but wonder if there were things that he had said to be nice that ended up not being true.
She couldn't imagine him ever wanting to purposely hurt anyone's feelings. That was one of the many reasons why she regarded him as one of the best people she had ever met in the entirety of the world.
"Want some nachos with that cheesiness?" Ying Sheng teased at him as she placed her hand on his shoulder.
Liam burst out laughing at her words, giving his head a shake.
"Alright, alright. How's your business plan coming along?" Liam asked her.
Ying Sheng sighed softly as she shrugged, not even having the energy to lie about her progress with that. He knew that it was a big and daunting project for her, even if it was on something that she was passionate about. The fact of that actually put more pressure on her to do as close to perfect work as she could on her business plan.