Chapter 2094 Tears
Chapter 2094 Tears
Nan Hua nodded.
It has been a while since she was being served so thoroughly, but this would be her life from now on. Well, she was definitely not the type of person who would stay in a residence for a long time without coming out.
But there was no need for her to purposely make things difficult for herself as she also wanted to go outside from time to time. …
As Nan Hua was dressing up, Yan Jin Nian was staring at the person who came up with disbelief on her face. Even though the man looked much older than the one in her memory and he was no longer standing but sitting on a wheelchair, she could never mistake him for anyone else. Because he was the man who had been carved into her heart. “You…” Yan Jin Nian’s eyes turned moist. Gu Xia Mo looked at Yan Jin Nian, who was wearing glamorous yet at the same time simple clothes, and felt heartache.
He knew very well that those people who lived in the palace suffered a lot. Because even though everything looked glamorous, it was actually the dirtiest place to live and also the place where a lot of blood was shed. How many people died in the Imperial Palace for the sake of power and also favor?
It was simply uncountable.
Looking at Yan Jin Nian, who even though she looked somewhat older, she still looked very beautiful. His heart hurt when he thought that he had let her live in such a place for so many years and never came. Yet at the same time, he knew very well that he couldn’t come here, not with so many things on his hand and so many people were depending on him for their lives. “Jin Nian… I’m sorry.” Thousands of words in Gu Xia Mo’s throat finally could only say these and looked at Yan Jin Nian somewhat guiltily. He thought that they would never have any fate in this world, something that he regretted upon countless times. And now, looking at Yan Jin Nian, Gu Xia Mo could no longer restrain the feelings in his heart.
But all he could say was apology. Sorry for not coming to see you.
Sorry for not being there for you.
Sorry for not looking for you.
Countless apologies ran in Gu Xia Mo’s head, yet he couldn’t bring them all to words. Because right now, he just wanted to apologize to Yan Jin Nian as he could not come to her. Their distance was so far in this world and Gu Xia Mo had no time to look for Yan Jin Nian.
When he did….
He felt he was no longer qualified and feared that Yan Jin Nian would blame him for not looking for her. He was worried that she would hate him and feared that she would never want to see him ever again. Even if it was possible for him to <return to their previous world after their time in this world was over without remembering anything, he would still feel terribly guilty for his decision.> He claimed that he loves her, but at the end of the day, he could not look for her because of his own private matters and eventually didn’t dare to come. Now, sitting here in front of Yan Jin Nian, Gu Xia Mo didn’t dare to step forward. He’s afraid. Afraid that Yan Jin Nian would not want him.
But even if she was angry with him, Gu Xia Mo was ready to accept it all. Because he knew that it was all his mistake to not come here and find her, leaving her to face the world alone while he was wallowed in his own matters, not coming to find her in the slightest bit. “I…”
Before Gu Xia Mo could speak again, Yan Jin Nian had already arrived in front of him and stretched her hand, hugging the man in front of her. “Ah Mo… Ah Mo…” Yan Jin Nian chocked.
The day when Yan Jin Nian came to this world, she was afraid and fearful because she knew very well that she was in a different world and also alone. But after receiving the memory and knowing her situation, she knew very well that she could not cry.
Because she had to be strong to survive. No matter what she was feeling inside, she could never show it on the surface. She had to stay strong and face these people as if she felt nothing. Even if there were times when she wanted to break down, she didn’t dare to.
Just because she wanted to live. Even if in the end she didn’t know why she wanted to live, she didn’t want to die either. She just tried her best to keep on the strong front, trying her best to make sure that she would continue to survive. Blending the memory of this body, Yan Jin Nian knew she had no one to truly confide. Her father and brother were too weak.
Even if they do care for her, Yan Jin Nian didn’t want them to know what she had experienced nor showing her weak side to them. She had to bear everything on her own. But the moment Yan Jin Nian saw Gu Xia Mo, flood of memories and emotions from her previous life just came towards her. The door she had locked away in order to keep her emotions in check was simply destroyed.
And now, all Yan Jin Nian wanted was to cry.
Cry her heart out to the person she knew she could trust and depend on. The very person she also loves with her entire heart. She missed him so badly.
Over a decade without any news in this world and Yan Jin Nian had no ability to find him, she could only helplessly continue her life.
Even if she was putting on a smile on her face, it could not erase the fact that her heart was aching. Now, all she wanted was simply to vent all of her feelings.
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