I Only Wanted A Class In The Apocalypse

“I’m taking this piece of land of yours,” I waved my glaive high in the air a couple of times, “surrender or fight, it’s up to you.”

“How about this… I help you take all the land around me in exchange for leaving me alone?”

“Help me… How?” I laughed, “don’t dream about showing me around and act as my tour guide. I don’t need such help.”

“I didn’t mean that.”

“Adding your army to mine won’t help either. I can simply take your head and that army will be mine.”

“I didn’t mean that either,” he shook his head before suddenly giving me such grand news, “lots of lords here already grew aware of your presence and movement. They said you left your territory unwatched, unguarded, without a single defensive building or troops. Only a giant weak looking behemoth stood there in watch.”

“And?” I could already expect what he was trying to say.

“Most of them led their forces and are heading towards your land as we speak. I can show you around and make you take their lands.”

“Without killing all of them, these lands won’t be mine,” nice try, jerk. Did you think that I was new and ignorant?

“But what if they left their lords behind?” yet his face didn’t change when I said that. Instead, he smiled as he added, “killing their lords with few forces on his side isn’t a big problem for you, right?”

“That’s great indeed if what you are saying is true. Besides… Where does your contribution here lie?”

Even by telling me this piece of intel, this couldn’t be counted as enough contribution for me to let him off the hook.

“I can guide you to all the territories around without forces to defend them. After that, you can just disperse your armies and attack all of them simultaneously.”

“This…”

“If you are thinking about taking them down one by one then let me tell you this… It’s a big mistake! In this world, we have nothing more than eyes that watch everywhere. So you’ll end up having a couple of territories before other lords will recall their forces back and they’ll fight you together. And that is a dead end for you and a rough path to tread upon.”

I have to admit, he had a point here. “So what? I can guess that most of the territories here did that. So I can simply take a tour and determine my targets.”

“But your chariot is already famous. Once spotted on the move, all of the lords will get notified.”

“And?”

“I know which territory got few forces behind. I can even tell you the exact number of forces at each one, the rough strength of each lord, and how to kill him or her.”

“Hmm… And how do you plan on doing so?”

“I got a map here,” he took out a folded piece of paper with many lines and drawings on one of its sides, “and I got eyes everywhere. I can pinpoint the locations your armies shall go, and then you can hit all of them at the same time.”

“Interesting…”

“Lord, don’t listen to him, he is just trying to buy his ticket out of danger by such nonsense!”

Just while I stood on my chariot, thinking about what this old man said, the lord who kept chasing after me shouted, “let me be the one to lead your forces and claim these lands for you. They know you, but they don’t know me.”

“Humph! Lang, stop fooling around. I got the news that your land is already in ruins. If not for you being here, running away from danger, then the forces looking for you would have found you a long time ago.”

Oh, so this was the main reason then. I looked at Lang for a long moment before sighing.

“Pal, you got your chance and yet you spoiled it by your greed.”

“No lord, I’m willing to follow you, be your lackey,” and just when all of his secrets got exposed like this in the open, he fell to his knees, “I beg you. Take me under your wing and save me from the incoming armies.”

“Armies?” I raised one eyebrow, and the middle aged lord interfered as he said:

“I don’t know how the two of you met, but Lang has too many enemies. This little punk has a dirty mind in there, and he did lots of bad things to many other lords before. So, you can guess how big the armies coming after him are.”

That middle aged lord pointed at his head, making me wonder how many lords did this little fellow offend.

“Lord… Please… I beg you…” Lang’s eyes turned all red, “I got a sick mother back in my world, and a couple of powerless sisters to look after.”

“Don’t add a debt, or else I’ll mistake you for a poor human kid and not a mighty lord with such strong forces and territory,” I couldn’t help but laugh. This dude… Did he think I’d fall for all this bullshit of his?

Sick mother? Weak and powerless sisters? Damn! He brought two sensitive matters to most, aiming at the soft spot at any heart.

Yet he aimed at the wrong heart this time, as mine had no such weakness.

“Lord…” and as he realised this, his lips trembled and his desperate face turned all vicious and cruel, “no matter what, I’m not going to leave your side! These lords can come and kill me, but they’ll take you down with me as well.”

“Pretty nasty,” I laughed. This dude was just the type I liked to have on my side.

Such a dude would bring trouble, great trouble, to my enemies thanks to his unique mind and thinking.

But accepting him without putting him under heavy shackles would be a grave mistake as well. Such idiots had no loyalty or honour, except for themselves and their benefits.

“No problem for me,” I suddenly shrugged, “after all I’m going to accept this lord’s invitation.”