Ihoujin, Dungeon ni Moguru

Chapter 212: Do Electric Pods Dream Of A Tower In A Plain? IV

『Makina is so very sorry!』

It was evening.

When Yukikaze and the others reached home, they found Makina prostrated in front of the door.

「Eh, what’s the matter?」

「Ohh, are you alright?!」

The old man came running down the hallway. He looked worried, but he had a bowl of udon in one hand.

「I’m fine, Gramps」

『Myself is there. It’s only natural』

「Then deal with them before they abduct her!」

The old man was furious.

「Really, it’s as he said」

Yukikaze had an exasperated look on her face.

『Even if you say that……』

Gunmerry brushed off the criticisms he was getting from both sides.

「So, Gramps, what’s this about?」

Makina was still lying face downward in front of the door.

「Yeah, she wanted to apologize for the trouble she had caused. Don’t mind her」

「Makina, it’s fine, so raise your head」

『Yes』

Makina rolled over until she was facing upwards. It was not quite the way Yukikaze expected her to raise her head[1].

「There’s no reason for you to be blamed, so don’t worry about it」

『Understood. ………Makina won’t worry about it!』

She got up and hummed to herself as she disappeared down the hallway. She looked as shiny as a brand new pod.

（I can’t tell if she was actually worried about it or not. Is she just cunning, I wonder?）

Leaving that aside.

「Gramps, I’m sorry, but I was wondering if you could reach out to some of your old contacts for me」

「Sure, but which kind? Military or corporate?」

「Ummm, both?」

Yukikaze beckoned the old man outside. Parked in front of the house was a large truck.

And one huge A.I.

『Hello, good evening』

The gorilla pod raised one hand in greeting.

The old man frowned.

「I want you to strip this unit down, cleanse its aqueous brain, and transplant it into a mini-pod. Sell its built-in armaments to the military and its parts to the corporations. Please make sure that nothing can be traced back to us」

「Well, that’s no problem. What an interesting pod. Is it a custom design?」

『It was likely made using zero-generation technologies that were misappropriated. The man who abducted Yukikaze was an A.I. specialist who was providing technical assistance to a certain military. There’s a chance we’ll find out more』

「Zero-generation technologies that are basically a black box, huh? Well, everything is a learning experience. I’ll have a go at it」

『We’re in your care. Everyone, gather』

「Huh?」

The back of the truck opened up like a butterfly opening its wings, then gorilla pod after gorilla pod filed out.

「Hey, just how many of them are there?」

『Including the ones in the other truck that’ll soon arrive, there’s 40 combat A.I.s, 3 support pods, and 6 worker pods in all』

「This is gonna take all night」

『Myself will help you』

「I need to tune you up first. Stop modifying yourself without permission, you idiot」

『Roger』

Gunmerry saluted the repair chief.

The gorilla pods saluted as well.

「Alright then, let’s get you guys into the house one at a time. The rest of you go wait in the courtyard」

『Sir, yes, sir』

Thud, thud, thud, the footsteps of the gorilla pods rocked the area. The neighbors came running out of their front doors to see what was going on.

Yukikaze bowed her head in apology.

「Gramps, do we still have boxes of cakes left? You didn’t eat them all, did you?」

「We do have tins of assorted cookies if that’s alright?」

「I’m going to go give them out to the neighbors」

「Yeah. We’ve got pre-paid cards near the tea tins in the living room. Let’s give those out together with the cookies」

「Got it. We sure are racking up the expenses today, huh?」

「Hang in there, President」

「Yeah, yeah」

The work continued until the dead of night, and then a new day dawned.

『We’re definitely in the black. It was a good thing we were able to seize all the assets and facilities of that researcher in question. Even if we spend a lot of money on the cover-up, we’ll still be making a profit』

In the morning, at the low dining table in the living room, Yukikaze looked at the numbers on her tablet to grasp the current status of the company.

Even at a conservative estimate, the company’s total assets would increase sixfold. They were all hidden assets though.

「Gunmerry, tell me, did you let me get abducted in anticipation of this?」

『No way~ Ha ha ha~』

Gunmerry turned away blatantly.

He was acting suspiciously, but there was no point in pursuing the matter, so she dropped it.

『Here you go~, breakfast is ready~』

Makina, who had an apron wrapped around her lower half, came in with breakfast.

What she laid out on the low dining table was rice, salted salmon, omelette, pickled Chinese cabbage, and miso soup.

「………………」

Yukikaze stared at the perfectly normal breakfast.

「Do you see this, Gunmerry? This is what’s called a proper breakfast. Not delivered food, not convenience store bentos, but a real breakfast!」

『This food is no big deal. This miso soup is just instant soup anyway』

「It’s totally different from your heated canned beans and boiled potatoes!」

Yukikaze clasped her hands together and said, “Itadakimasu,” then took a bite of the Japanese rolled omelette using her chopsticks.

「It’s so soft. And fluffy」

Next, she took some of the salmon and shoveled it into her mouth along with some rice. She chewing thoroughly before swallowing. After cleansing her palate with the Chinese cabbage, she took a sip of the miso soup.

「Makina………This breakfast gets 600 points」

『Thank you very much. By the way, what’s the highest score you’ve given so far?』

「30 points for the plain udon noodles Gramps made. By the way, everything Gunmerry made got 1 point」

『Hawawa, many thanks for such a high score』

Makina expressed her gratitude then turned to Gunmerry.

『Gunmerry-sama, you’re the equivalent of a ninth-generation, but you can’t cook?』

『Myself believes that cooking is a woman’s job. So it’s not like myself can’t――――――』

『Can you really?』

The tone in which she spoke was thoroughly mocking.

『………………』

『Well, Makina was originally a cooking robot, so something of this level is well within Makina’s capabilities. ………Ah, but who would have thought that even a ninth-generation equivalent would not be able to cook~?』

『Makina, come to the basement for a minute. Myself will show you who’s boss around here』

『Kyaa! Save Makina, Yukikaze-chan!』

「Seconds」

Gunmerry’s tough love was thwarted by a request for seconds.

After having four more helpings of breakfast, Yukikaze sipped a cup of after-meal tea as she settled in and relaxed.

She seemed so calm that it was hard to believe she had been abducted just the previous day.

「Ahhh, this is bliss. After everything that has happened, I’m so glad we brought Makina here. How can this guy have all that performance and still be unable to cook, huh?」

『It saddens myself that you feel that way』

Gunmerry looked grumpy. He was shaking his leg while seated cross-legged.

『♪～』

Makina was humming a tune as she washed the dishes. It was a nostalgic tune from the past, but one Yukikaze couldn’t quite place.

「Oh, that’s right」

Yukikaze remembered something else.

「Makina, did you draw something?」

『Yes~. Makina has drawn a picture~』

After putting away the dishes and wiped her arms dry with a cloth, Makina took a picture out of the belly of her pod.

Then……

『Forward march』

Fweet, fweet, fweet, audio of a whistle was played at regular intervals.

At the same time, A.I. mini-pods “walked” towards them. They were regular mini-pods with short arms and legs attached. They looked just like toy soldiers.

The four units that had undergone the conversion ahead of the others marched into the room like a squadron of soldiers.

『All troops, halt. Salute』

In a neat line, they saluted Yukikaze.

『Good morning!』

『Morning!』

『Mourning!』

『Mooring!』

The combat A.I.s that were transplanted into mini-pods weren’t able to control the normal mini-pods properly as a result of spending so long with limbs.

Thanks to the repair chief’s ingenious idea of attaching limbs to the pod, the A.I.s were able to self-optimize by themselves and become able to walk autonomously. With a few more adjustments, they would probably be able to run as well.

Needless to say, all of this was completely illegal under A.I. laws.

「Yes, good morning. Have you guys finished your drawings?」

『Roger』

『We drew~』

『Drawn~』

『Drew it~』

The repair chief hadn’t taken a break and was still working. He was still an incurable workaholic despite his age, and on top of that, he believed that dying on the job would be the best way to go.

In his employment contract was the line, “Never stop me in the middle of work regardless of what happens,” so there was nothing Yukikaze or Gunmerry could do to stop him.

『We drew stuff too~』

「You guys have already done this before, remember?」

『We drew again~』

『Right~?』

『Right~』

The normal mini-pods also gathered around, bringing their drawings with them.

Perhaps it was an effect of being prohibited from doing it all their lives, but many of Yukikaze’s A.I.s loved to draw.

「Then, everyone, let’s show off what you’ve drawn to each other, alright?」

『Okay~』

Replied the A.I.s.

「All together now」

Though the drawings that they presented in unison differed in details and artistic ability, they all had the same motif.

Blue skies,

A green plain,

And, like a horn stabbed into the ground, a white tower in the distance.

[1] The Japanese version of “raise your head/stop bowing” is literally “(an unspecified action, ie turn/tilt/lift/raise/anything works) your face up”. Yeah, I think you get the gag now and yes, it really doesn’t work in English if I want the English part to make any sense and using “raise your head” is already making me cringe as it is.

You get it, don’t you? I mean, the title of this side-story pretty much gives it away already, especially since Tortch has touched on it before. The A.I.s of the modern world all see the alternate world in their dreams. But it’s not just that, they all dream of a very specific “tower” in that world. On that topic, I’m 99% sure that the title is a play on Philip K Dick’s “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?”, which the famous classic movie “Blade Runner” was loosely based on.

Lots of interesting revelations, huh? But in the end, what’s the point of this side-story? Well……stay tuned!