Chapter 877: Answers
Chapter 877: Answers
Fang Xin, the mental patient, asked me if I wanted to know what research Ai ShuQiao had done with my blood, where Su Qiao was being held, when my father and Auntie Ren would get married… and even the name of Gong CaiCai’s first born child.
Of course I want to know! If you can answer those questions, you would already be a god! I would believe it even if Professor Bai said that there were aliens living in your body!
Seeing me eagerly waiting for answers, Fang Xin put on a horrible smile and said in an inscrutable and mysterious tone:
“Ye Lin, the answers to these questions you want to know… I want to know too!”
Damn! So you’re just as clueless as me after getting my hopes up! Don’t try and stop me! I’m going to kill him with a brick!
After deceiving me, Fang Xin continued to preach to me without changing his expression:
“Although the answers to the questions on the Akashic records are vague…”
“Akashic my ass! Isn’t it just the calculation program! Last time, you even said that I splashed blood on the Akashic records in a previous life which caused the lines related to me to be blurred… so according to what you said, exactly how much blood was splattered on the Akashic records! Did someone have their period on it?!”
“Sigh.” Fang Xin sighed softly, “Since the sacred Akashic records has been defiled by you, we have no choice but to call it by its name in the current era. The karma calculation program is a very great…”
“What do you mean it was defiled by me! I don’t get periods! You keep talking about ‘universe’ and ‘era’ and make it sound really important! It sounds like you’re saying that not only will the two of us be reincarnated, but the period stained Akashic records will also be reincarnated! So it’s possible that the toilet paper in my house might be a reincarnated emperor!”
I wanted to expose Fang Xin by spewing different insults at him, but I didn’t expect him to be unmoved at all —— he was indeed mentally ill.
“Ye Lin, such a great existence will not be diminished by your slander. Although I can’t tell you the answers to those questions for the time being, as long as you join Happy Science and continue to provide us with information, it won’t take long for the omnipotent calculation program to figure out the answers!”
“You can’t even predict the lottery, but you still say that it’s omnipotent…”
Fang Xin suddenly stopped talking as if I had hit a sore spot.
He looked at me with an eerie expression, or rather, looked through me at the void behind me.
At this moment, we were standing face to face under the telephone pole at the intersection. No pedestrians approached us because of Fang Xin’s striped mental patient uniform.
Fang Xin’s face began to melt bit by bit.
It wasn’t melting like it was a horror movie. His original expression was stiff like he was coated with a layer of wax, but he suddenly became more alive like a Picasso oil painting, which made me have to use the word ‘melting’.
All good liars are actors. The acting skills that Fang Xin was going to portray was good enough to win several Best Actor awards. He seems to have become another person just by changing his expression.
“I… why am I here?”
Fang Xin pressed his forehead with his hand and muttered to himself in confusion.
There it is! Schizophrenia! It’s not enough for some people to separate out a second personality, they also need to separate out a third and fourth personalities to play mahjong together!
However, judging from Fang Xin’s situation, the personality that appeared in front of me should be his own personality. The one I had been dealing with earlier was Fang Xin’s second personality —— as Professor Bai said, when Fang Xin was mentally ill, even his own father thought he was a stranger.
“Ah… I remembered.” Fang Xin pointed at me with a trembling finger, “the ‘great one’ who lives in me wants you to join Happy Science…”
Huh? So it’s not split personalities! One refers to himself as god and the other refers to himself as god’s vessel.
“Stop pretending!” I grabbed Fang Xin’s sleeve and said, “Your hospital gown should have the contact information of the hospital written on it, right? Hurry up and call someone to take you back…”
“Idiot!” Fang Xin broke away from me with exaggerated movements, “How dare you disobey the orders of the great one?! Have you not listened to the truth! Have you not realized the cruel truth of this world! Only with the great one’s enlightenment can mankind be reborn!”
“Then, as the vessel of the great one, how are you going to enlighten mankind? Did you set up a cult to scam people and let mankind know that money is simply a material possession?”
“Nonsense!” Fang Xin, who no longer kept the same expression on his face, said angrily, “Before I was possessed by the great one, I was committed to enlightening human wisdom! Back then, I worked hard and wrote a lot of books. I brought knowledge to mankind! My merits will last forever!”
“Huh? Before you wrote the calculation program, did you write a book to spread the cult?” I said scornfully, “What kind of books have you written?”
Fang Xin puffed out his chest proudly, “I’m the author of ‘How to Become a Buddha Immediately’, ‘Couple’s Cultivation’, ‘Yin and Yang Wall Suction’ and ‘Farmers’ Handbook to Prevent Being A Victim of Fraud in the City’!”
Holy shit! Fang Xin’s main personality is too funny! It really feels weird when you combine it with his second personality of a god. it gives people a very weird feeling! The first three books could be said to help spread cult ideas, but what’s up with ‘Anti-Fraud Manual for Farmers Going to Cities’? Do you want to say that as long as farmers join Happy Science, they won’t be deceived by others, but will only be deceived by you?!
While Fang Xin transitioned from a ‘god psycho’ to a ‘funny psycho’, I calmed down and thought about Professor Bai’s proposal.
In fact, joining Happy Science was already a part of my plan. After all, one of the deals between me and Ai ShuQiao was to steal a copy of the calculation program.
Now that Professor Bai has seen through my plan, he extended an olive branch to me for cooperation, hoping to form an alliance with me to deal with Ai ShuQiao.
Ai ShuQiao was not a good person and Happy Science was not a good religion. In this case, why can’t I be a double agent, verbally agreeing to cooperate with Professor Bai, but actually looking for opportunities to steal the calculation program and make the most of their resources to restrain Ai ShuQiao’s actions in Dong Shan City?
There’s a lot of pros and no cons! I was confident that I would never be brainwashed by Happy Sience. Even if I joined, it would just for show. What could Professor Bai and his son Fang Xin get from me, a middle school student? They believed in the calculation program too much and bet on me when the program came to the conclusion that I would defeat Ai ShuQiao. They thought that I would inherit a large amount of property in the future, and then donate it to Happy Science!
Fang Xin and Professor Bai actually worshipped the program they wrote like a god, is there something wrong with their heads?! If the program advises you to win over me, you would do it without any hesitation?
Just as I was about to verbally agree to Fang Xin in joining Happy Science, I saw two tall male nurses in white coats charging towards Fang Xin.
“Crazy Fang, time to go back and take your meds!”
“For the sake of Dong Shan Mental Hospital’s reputation, we definitely won’t let you run away again next time!”
They grabbed onto Fang Xin’s arms without any explanation, one on the left and the other on the right, and dragged Fang Xin to an ambulance that was parked on the street.
The moment he was caught, Fang Xin’s face became calm again, I guess his god personality came out again.
“Ye Lin, if you want to change your destiny and that of the whole world, come to Dong Shan Mental Hospital and find me. I will always be waiting for you…”
“Don’t listen to him!” One of the male nurses turned back to me and said, “This man is so sick that the other mentally ill patients in the hospital can’t even stand him. If you believe what he says, it will lead to huge problems!”
Fang Xin was locked into the isolation cage of the ambulance, and the two male nurses took him away.
At this moment, my phone vibrated, it was another call from Professor Bai.
“So how was it?” Professor Bai said in a calm tone, “The calculation program tells me that there’s a 95% chance that you will agree to join. So, is your answer to join Happy Science?”
“I’ll join.” Since they had already calculated such a high probability, there was no point in me being coy.
“But I won’t believe you unless you can show me that the calculation program really has the ability to accurately predict the future. Until then, I’ll remain skeptical.”
“Haha, so you’re really looking for an opportunity to get closer to the program so that you can steal a copy.” Professor Bai revealed my inner thoughts, “But both Ai ShuQiao and you have mistaken a basic concept. The calculation program can’t be stolen that easily, or rather, it’s impossible to be stolen…”
Without explaining to me why the calculation program can’t be stolen, Professor Bai made an agreement with me that after school tomorrow, I would go to the Happy Science seminar room to meet with him to discuss joining.
I agreed and asked to take another person with me.
I had originally decided that Xiao Qin and I would join Happy Science together so that we could take care of each other. Xiao Qin was a good liar, and she was also a professional at pretending to be meek. It was fine to act the same way to deal with those liars.