Life, Once Again!

Chapter 1004. Crank Up 10

Perhaps he had forgotten something important. Junmin had that notion as soon as he woke up. Leaving aside the ‘ears’ thing that people around him talked about, he felt like he had forgotten something very important, and also entirely. However, no matter how hard he rummaged through his historical field, he couldn’t find any clues. In fact, the more he looked it up, the more he found out that he was meticulous about everything he did except for the matter with ears.

“You did say something along those lines before, president. You said you’d know by just looking at people’s ears, just like how a talented fortune teller could tell the future by looking at someone’s face. You said it like that too.”

Head manager Kang said those words, so it was definitely true. Even though he himself, who supposedly said those words, had forgotten that completely, the people around him still remembered. Just why, though? He went to his psychotherapist friend after a long time for some consultation.

“Considering the mental stress you received back then, it’s not strange that it incurred some kind of memory loss. Miss Jung Haejoo was a truly precious person to you.”

When he heard those words, he looked back at the past again. In the few years following her death, he had been the busiest in his life. He looked for and picked out people with potential and helped out so that they could bring out their talents in another area. Everything that constituted ‘Lee Junmin’ was created back then, whether it was his connections to the political realm or his foothold in the entertainment industry. Jumin browsed not his business records, but his diary. He realized that there were many abstract expressions. He preferred not to write in this kind of way. He looked at the words that could contain multiple meanings. He soon noticed a commonality among them. When he expressed his opinions about someone he met for the first time, he expressed them as ‘good’ or ‘not good.’ He never evaluated people like this. He would write in detail about what kind of talent, specialties, personality, appearance, or preferences a person had. Differentiating them into ‘good’ and ‘not good’ seemed like the most useless evaluation ever.

Just what was he thinking back then? Junmin sighed. His memories may have weathered down, but there should be some traces, and yet, they had entirely disappeared as though they were weeded out to the roots.

He looked at Haejoo’s photo. She was the only woman he ever loved, and no such woman would appear in the future. He could say for sure that she was his everything, but she strangely felt distant for some reason. Perhaps the lost memories might be related to Haejoo, or at least, he had that vague thought. After looking at the photo for a long time, Junmin flipped the photo over. He stood up and cleaned his bed before getting washed. He changed his clothes and said goodbye to his dogs before leaving his house.

He spat out his impressions about the ‘disappeared memories’ echoing in his head with a single breath. For him to keep clinging to the past, there were too many family members to support on his shoulders. He just treated it as help from time and looked forward instead. Perhaps this was what being human was about.

“Yes, chairman.”

He got a call as soon as he grabbed the driving wheel. YM’s chairman greeted him with an excited voice.

-I’d like to invite that child over. I wonder if he has the time?

* * *

“Thank you for your work.”

Giwoo said goodbye to everyone he made eye contact with at the set before leaving. His taut lips were nearly twitching. He pressed the corner of his lips with his thumbs. The more time passed, the harder it became to smile, even though he could do such a thing reflexively without being conscious about it just a while ago.

“Giwoo, do you want to go home immediately?”

“You should go home first.”

He had the manager go home first and got in his car. He put on some music on his phone and tossed it on the passenger seat. After listening to about two tracks, he started the car. He drove on roads that weren’t jammed without thinking. The stifling sensation that felt like it blocked his chest hadn’t gone away ever since the beginning of the year. If he could vomit it out, he would have drunk straight bottles of tequila already. However, this wasn’t a problem that liquor could solve. It would probably remain behind like a lump of cancer until he removed the source of it.

He drove near a city park before putting on the brakes. He saw an advert for the Q-series phones on the side of a bus. It was a simple advert with just the phone and the product name, but Giwoo focused on Maru smiling brightly. His molars screamed. He hurriedly loosened his jaws. He even heard from the dentist that he should look after them.

How did it come to this? He agitatedly pressed the car horn. A couple sitting on the park bench looked over before moving away. He suddenly felt pathetic and took his hands off. A silly laugh leaked out of his mouth.

“Fuck, fuck this thing.”

His grandfather’s order was still in effect. Those who used to hang out with him together for their little ‘games’ no longer kept in touch after some time. When he reached out to them after some difficulty, the only response he got was that it would be difficult to call him in the future. His grandfather’s words, telling him to befriend great people, had started to influence his reality. His grandfather’s words weren’t some vain echoes that dissipated into thin air, they were no different from laws that had been revised and put into effect. The only ones that he could reach were those that had displayed their excellence in various fields or received acknowledgment from above. The important thing, however, was that those people were no fun. Whether they were actually kind or putting on a pretense, he did not know, but they weren’t interested in his games.

Even the other chaebol youngsters he used to party with had become difficult to meet. The Hong Janghae incident, despite being quietly muddled over in the eyes of the public, had become quite a hot topic in the industry, so everyone was restraining themselves. Of course, his grandfather probably had an influence on this as well.

It was a liberal isolation. He felt like he was abandoned by himself on an island full of attractions. Toys can last a day or two, but playing around with inorganic things that did not respond to anything was no fun. This boredom, vexation, and faint fury could only be calmed down by extricating that guy from his life or bringing the woman next to that man onto the island.

-Are you returning home?

“Why would you want to know that, secretary Kim?”

-Because that is one of my duties.

“Then do your best looking for me.”

-That puts me in a difficult spot. While I can do that, I would like to form a relationship built on trust with you.

“Trust? You? After you put me in a state no different from confinement?”

-You are freely continuing your activities as an actor, enjoying your leisure and even going on travels. How is anything a confinement? If you call that confinement, then I’d love to enjoy it for myself.

“I’m not playing jokes with you.”

-Then please tell me where you are now, and when you would be returning.

“You bastard, you really….”

Just then, there was a sharp metal noise, followed by a tongue clicking that expressed his disappointment. Giwoo felt his back stiffening up.

-Giwoo.

“Yes, grandfather.”

-I have never raised you to throw tantrums. Just how much more will you disappoint me before you’re satisfied?

“Not at all, grandfather. That was not my intention.”

-Is secretary Kim your friend? Or are you saying that you are challenging my authority? I should have told you to listen to secretary Kim.

“I’m sorry.”

There was a series of tongue-clicking noises.

-I wonder why it came to this. While you were impulsive, you weren’t the kind to be reckless without being able to hold back. Should I have let you roll in some mud? I let you do whatever you want because you weren’t fit to continue the company, and it seems you’re turning into an empty shell. There’s nothing you can really do by yourself. When you were young, you were quite cute with clear eyes at least.

“I’m sorry, grandfather. I’ll do it properly.”

There was a moment of silence. Giwoo clutched the driving wheel. Above everything else, the words ‘there’s nothing you can really do by yourself’ really poked at his heart. He felt like the image he had built up until now was denied. But he couldn’t retort. The one he was talking to was his grandfather; his skies and his god.

-Forget it, come to my house. We have a guest.

“Yes. I’ll go there immediately.”

He drove his car to his grandfather’s house. He ignored all the red lights and increased his speed. He no longer wanted to hear of his grandfather’s disappointment in him. What he had to do now was to arrive as fast as possible.

Giwoo handed his keys to the butler standing in front of the garage. He checked himself to see if anything was wrong on his clothes before walking inside.

He could hear his grandfather’s laughter on the second floor. That man was someone who never laughed so heartily even after hearing that a multi-billion won contract had been signed. Just who came over? He climbed the stairs in nervousness. Every time he took a step, his grandfather’s voice became clearer. The first thing he saw when he went up was his grandfather laughing while even using his hand gestures. His gaze moved to the left. He saw a man facing his grandfather.

A chill crept down his back. His bladder squeezed. He could tell who that was just by looking at his back. His grandfather hinted at him after laughing – you should say hello if you’re here. Giwoo barely took a step and stood next to ‘that guy.’ The person talking to his grandfather raised his head and spoke,

“You’re here?”

“Han Maru. Why are you….”

“The chairman invited me.”

“I see.”

Since his grandfather was involved, he could not say anything about it. The only thing he could do was to sit down with his mouth shut. His grandfather spoke as soon as he sat down,

“Why have you never realized that such a good fella was next to you all this time and not those runts.”

Good fella – he felt like he was going to bleed from his ears. He even wished that he was deaf instead. His hand under the table trembled. That guy just looked at him a couple times but didn’t say anything. Giwoo looked down at the food. He felt like he would punch Han Maru if he looked at him.

“Well then. Let’s eat first. We can’t let the food go cold,” his grandfather said.