Red Envelope Group of the Three Realms

403 A Test for the Dirty Minded



After leaving the airport, Song Qincheng went to her hotel while Chen Xiaobei returned home.

He promised to send her a First Love Peach after dinner, while not forgetting to replace the love eggs he bought for Wei Xiaobao.

When he finally reached home, Yap Liangchen told Chen Xiaobei that he killed another two-dozens of assassins sent from Japan. The news strengthened his resolve for a Japan trip where he would destroy the Meichuan Organization.

However, this was not the time for him to head to the island – Luo Puti would be coming to Green Vine City in a few days, and he would then travel to Japan with her to locate the special person she mentioned.

Initially, Chen Xiaobei wanted to train and raise his cultivation, but got distracted when he found that he had been added into a new chat group.

The circle was created by Wei Xiaobao himself, and was similar to the group created by Mengpo. One glance at the moderators and creator of the group, and Chen Xiaobei could tell that this was the lecherous chat group that was hinted in the Red Envelope group last night.

Admin: Wei Xiaobao has seven wives, but legend says that he is still on the look for more.

Moderator: Zhu Baijie's legs turn into jelly whenever he sees pretty ladies.

Moderator: Bull Demon King is the sugar daddy for a group of succubi. He's thinking about making Goddess Zhixia his mistress.

Moderator: Perverted Spirit. Chen Xiaobei was not familiar with this guy – probably just another denizen from hell.

Moderator; Hong Haier. The brat is quite knowledgeable in all things adult – here's to hoping that he trumps his dad in the field after he grows up!

There were over a hundred members in the group; most of them were monsters or spirits. They would talk about anything and everything since there were no rules and restrictions.

Perverted Spirit: I'm telling you guys. I saw the Black Officer of Impermanence forcing a female spirit carry out the hidden rules of underworld realm yesterday! (Smile)

Zhu Bajie: How long did he last? Three minutes? (Smile)

Bull Demon King: How long is his dick? Three centimeters?

Perverted Spirit: Hehehe…

Everyone: Hehehe…

Hong Haier: My turn. I saw my dad banging Silver Fox yesterday! (Cool)

Wei Xiaobao: How big? How long? What style? (Need answers ASAP)

Hong Haier: I'll tell you if you send me a porn magazine! (Cool)

Bull Demon King: You insolent child! I'll spank you to death if you do this again!

Perverted Spirit: What's there to hide? Even I myself have seen you f*ck other gals quite often. Granted, your dick is huge, but you last just three minutes and do it in the Anvil position every single time. Boring! (Digging nose)

Everyone: Hahahahahahahaha…

Bull Demon King: Nonsense! Recently, I've been drinking Hundred Fruits Dragon Dick Moonshine. My battles lasted at least half an hour since then!

Zhu Bajie: Hundred Fruits Dragon Dick Moonshine! (Salivating)

Perverted Spirit: That's the stuff! (Salivating)

Hong Haier: Is that moonshine delicious? I'm thinking about asking for some from God Chen! (Smile)

Wei Xiaobao: And you don't have to go looking for him. He's already in this group!

Everyone: Welcome! Welcome! God Chen! Come and say hi to everyone!

'Damn! Everyone is asking me to talk…' Chen Xiaobei thought. He was caught off guard after he become engrossed in just watching their happy conversation. He soon made his appearance so as to make himself appear sneaky.

Chen Xiaobei: Erm… Erm… Good afternoon everyone…

Everyone: Welcome! Welcome!

Wei Xiaobao: As is group tradition, new member must share a dirty story!

Chen Xiaobei: (Sweat) Erm… I really have no idea on what to share…

Wei Xiaobai: God Chen, don't be shy! We are family here, be more open-minded!

Zhu Bajie: That's right. You're a man, don't act like a wimp!

Hong Haier: God Chen! Are you still an innocent cherry boy? (Shock)

Perverted Spirit: No way! The legendary God Chen is still a virgin? Hahaha… This is going to be huge! (Laughing)

Suddenly, the whole group became even more lively. Every single member of this group was really experienced when it came to sex, and they were extremely excited to find a pure virgin like Chen Xiaobei joining the group.

'Opps. What's wrong with being a virgin? Is it offensive? Why are you guys looking down on me?' Chen Xiaobei thought rather unhappily as he clenched his cellphone.

"No way!" He seethed. "I shall fight back! You guys want dirty stories, huh? Everybody has a few!"

Chen Xiaobei: Ahem… Silence please! It's not that I don't want to share dirty stories, I just don't want to embarrass you people.

Perverted Spirit: Stop boasting and tell us the truth. We won't look down on you! (Grin)

Zhu Bajie: God Chen… Stop struggling. Being a virgin is not embarrassing at all. We can't turn back the time to become a virgin again, even if we want to! (Grinn)

Hong Haier: God Chen, you should not be embarrassed of yourself! Just learn from us through this group! Sooner or later, you will become experienced like us! (Grin)

Everyone was now mocking Chen Xiaobei; they were acting like a group of grown adults who keep laughing at a naïve kid.

"Hmph! Just you wait! You people are getting slapped!" Chen Xiaobei said with his eyebrows raised. He was now determined than ever to defend himself.

Chen Xiaobei: I'll give you guys a dirty mind test since no one believes me. You guys can mock me only if you can answer my questions correctly!

Zhu Bajie: Dirty mind test? Okay. I love it! Come at me! (Smug)

Perverted Spirit: Come! Come! Come! Give us your hardest question, I don't want others to claim that we bully innocent virgins! (Confident)

Hong Haier: I myself is plenty enough for God Chen! (Cool)

Chen Xiaobei: Okay! This is my first question! What does a pregnant woman and carrot rotting in the ground have in common?

Everyone turned quiet, and Chen Xiaobei waited for half a minute before texting again.

Chen Xiaobei: Guys, I need answers! Zhu Bajie, I thought you said you love dirty minded questions? I think you should answer it.

Zhu Bajie: Erm… Hmmm… What do they have in common… Perverted Spirit, answer!

Perverted Spirit: I… I'm having a headache… Hong Haier, deal with God Chen!

Hong Haier: Eh? The weather is pretty nice today… This moon is so big…

Chen Xiaobei: I thought you guys were really experienced when it comes to sex? How could any of you not know the answer to this simple question? Weak! (Digging nose)

Bull Demon King: Admin! You have the greatest dirty mind amongst all of us. It's time for you to show your powers!

Wei Xiaobao: Erm… I don't know the answer to this question. (Sweat) God Chen, please tell us the answer!

Chen Xiaobei: What happened? You guys surrender? (Cool)

Perverted Spirit: Give us the answer! No one will admit defeat if they think your answer doesn't makes sense! 

Chen Xiaobei: Hehe… Get ready to be surprised! The thing that they have in common is… they pulled out too late!

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