388 Like that day
On the other hand, Gu Shangyan and Lu Xuan were in a bar. The two were drinking heavily. The music was loud in the bar but still they were trying to have this heavy conversation here.
“When you asked me to vote for you in the meeting, I did not know you were going to take this step, “Gu Shangyan said as he gulped down a drink. “I have this urge to beat the hell out of you but what can I do? I am still your big brother who loves you a lot.”
If Gu Shangyan knew what his dear brother was planning, he swore that he was never going to be an accomplice in this plan. Still, something was telling him that he would be convinced by Lu Xuan in his damned plans. Their relationship had always been like this. Pretty weird and unexpected from the beginning. He still remembered the day when they first met and befriended each other. Who would have thought that the tyrant of the highschool he was sent to teach would end up becoming one of the closest people to his heart? Actually, Lu Xuan was the person he would call in all the situations. If he was drunk, he would call Lu Xuan. If he was smoking, he would call Lu Xuan. If he had a shitty day, he would call Lu Xuan. If he had a happy day, he would still call this damned man. The relationship between the two had been the deepest one since the time they met.
They had nothing in common yet they complemented each other so perfectly.
Lu Xuan laughed. He was drunk for sure but he was never more sober than this moment. He had gotten so drunk the past few days that the alcohol was not doing anything to him. He did not like this life. Where he could not even feel shitty without feeling guilty that he had his entire family worried. He just wanted to go far to feel like a miserable being whose family would not see him in that pathetic condition.
“Why are you doing this Lu Xuan?” Gu Shangyan asked. “Why are you doing this to yourself? Don’t you want your family with you? Don’t you think it would be better if you stayed with us?”
“Nah, “Lu Xuan answered with a slurry smile.
Gu Shangyan punched his face lightly, not enough to leave a bruise but enough to cause pain. “If only I could knock some senses into you.”
“Do you remember the day when you declared that you wanted to go to the UK?”Lu Xuan asked him.
How could Gu Shangyan forget about that day? Was that day even something that he would ever forget? It was the day when his entire life changed drastically. He must say that day was the paradigm shift of his life. Everything changed after that night when he told his family that he wanted to study in London and for many years, he could not return home. He died each day in that foreign country to leave it and return home but the foreign country did not leave him.
“I do, “Gu Shangyan answered his question.
“Do you know how much I wanted to stop you that day?” Lu Xuan said. “I wanted to punch you. Kick you. Bind you to bed. So you would not leave. You were my only brother. Only person in the world I could be myself without any worry or care but you left everything for that one girl.”
Gu Shangyan was not surprised to hear it. If he was at Lu Xuan’s place, he would have done the same but Lu Xuan did not do the same because he respected his brother’s choices too much. He literally left everything behind including his happiness for that one girl.
“Why did you not stop me?” Gu Shangyan asked.
“Would you have stopped?” Lu Xuan asked with a scoff.
Gu Shangyan paused and asked himself the same question? Would he have stopped leaving for London? No, he would not have. It was not just about Yoona but about his dream university too. He always wanted to study abroad. Sure, Yoona was a big reason why he left the country but it could not be ignored that he wanted to go there too.
And even if Lu Xuan had tried to stop him, he would have convinced his brother otherwise. There was no point in stopping at that moment.
“You know the answer, “Lu Xuan said. “You know that you would not have stopped. Do you know today I feel like we are back at that juncture again? I felt like I am leaving today like you and An Xiulan did all those years ago. But it sucked that my reasons are too selfish.”
Gu Shangyan hugged the man. “You are not selfish. Thinking about yourself does not make us selfish. If it is your decision, we will respect it.”
In the end, Lu Xuan was successfully able to convince Gu Shangyan too like An Xiulan.
“But you have to promise me that you will return sooner, “Gu Shangyan said. “If you took so many years like I did, I will reach wherever you are to drag you back home.”
Lu Xuan laughed. “Fine, you can do it.”
“Did you tell Auntie and Uncle why you are going?” Gu Shangyan asked.
Lu Xuan did not answer and he got his answer.
“You will have a lot of explaining to do with your family, “Gu Shangyan said with a sigh.
Lu Xuan nodded his head. They fell silent and began drinking more. After a while, he said, “Are you and Yoona thinking of getting together?”
“No,”Gu Shangyan answered. “We have fallen out of love a long time ago. I don’t want an empty relationship to empty us too.”
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Gu Shangyan fell silent. “What kind of question is it? I like her. She is a good friend. We never got close before but now that we are getting closer, I realized that she is actually a very nice person. I like spending time with her.”
“Do you like that nice person romantically?” Lu Xuan asked and Gu Shangyan fell silent. He said, “Big brother, find the answer to the question if you want a peaceful life. I won’t be here to help you. So, help yourself soon!”