Chapter 144 - Brutal Honesty
~ SASHA ~
Sasha glared at Kyelle as the woman stared at her, her eyes wide pools, but she showed none of the quiet dignity or care she'd been demonstrating since Sasha arrived. They faced each other, Kyelle watching her as if poised for a fight.
"I think if we are ever to be friends in truth," Kyelle said quietly, "I need to be honest with you."
"About what?"
"You understand our traditions of displaying? That the males attempt to entice females, draw their attention, and list their… attributes?"
In another circumstance, Sasha would have laughed. "Yes, I'm familiar," she said, her mind tripping back to the guy who'd stripped off and danced for her under the moonlight in that crowd of wolves.
Kyelle nodded. "Well, this morning when Zev visited, I knew I had to… I had to find out for certain that you two were intended. The Creator's match. I know Zev used to say he couldn't form the bond, but his reaction to you—"
"We are bonded," Sasha snapped.
Kyelle nodded again, keeping her chin low. "I'm aware of that now. You should know that Zev honored you. But… but I cannot let you regard me too highly. Because you should also know that had he… had he accepted my attentions this morning, I would have fought you for him. I would have… I would have taken him from you if I could."
Sasha blinked, her hands clenching to fists at her sides. "You tried to… entice him?"
"Yes," Kyelle said frankly. "And he denied me. Three times. Even turning his back when I didn't at first accept his answer. It is a… set down in our people. He is utterly certain of you, Sasha. He has no desire for any other female beyond you. You should know that."
"I do," Sasha said, though she wouldn't deny that hearing those words from a woman who'd apparently tried to steal him was… satisfying. "Why?" she asked brittley. "Why would you do that when he'd already told you?"
"Because I can tell you as a female Alpha over males, males often don't know their feet from their tailfeathers when it comes to their own emotions," Kyelle said dryly. "Honestly, I knew my chances were slim. But I had to know. I couldn't leave any questions. I couldn't risk… I couldn't bear to have him take you and then learn later that it wasn't a true match."
"It is," Sasha said again.
"I know. You are his heart's song. That is… that is significant, Sasha. I don't think you understand."
Sasha blinked, trying to remember. "You mean that… that call he did yesterday?"
Kyelle nodded, and grief painted her face. She looked down, clasping her hands at her waist, swallowing hard. "That is the highest connection within our people. A Pair chosen by… by the Creator. Or Fate. Or… perhaps the humans, who knows? All I know is that the mate pairs who have a heart song… they are inevitably happy when they are together."
Sasha sighed and nodded. "He makes my heart sing, too," she said, awkwardly. Why was she having this conversation with a woman she barely knew?
But she knew Zev, very closely, if Sasha had understood correctly. "Did you two ever… mate?"
Kyelle shook her head. "I haven't deceived you, Sasha. We have never been more than friends, though I know he was aware of my feelings. I just… I believe there is no shame in loving another Chimera. That we give honor when we love. So if I loved, and he didn't… I had to know. It was better to be turned away, than to not take the risk and later find out things could have been different."
Wow, Sasha thought.
She'd often thought herself, when a guy showed her attention when she wasn't interested, that she appreciated that they liked her. She appreciated the value they offered by pursuing her. But she'd felt badly for them, because her heart was so firmly in Zev's hands, though he was nowhere to be seen…
"You're very wise," she said to Kyelle a moment later. "And also very… strategic, aren't you?"
Kyelle gave a small smile and shrugged one shoulder. "You can't nest safely in the barn if you haven't learned how to avoid the cat."
Sasha stared at her and Kyelle stared back. "Do I need to worry about you, Kyelle? Do I need to watch you around my mate?"
"No," the woman said simply. "I hope… I hope the day will come that you and I will… trust each other as Zev and I have in the past. As friends. I hope you will see that though I am vulnerable in this, I offer myself to you. I hope we can be allies, Sasha. It's why I tell you this. You should know the truth and walk forward from that. You should not be placed in a position to learn that information from someone else. I'm certain Zev will tell you. I wanted to be the one to do it. So you would know that I'm also being honest when I say, I like you.
"There are so few females left, Sasha. And as a female Alpha, most of the other either see me as an authority figure, or think they cannot relax with me, because I might turn into one at any moment. They treat me as someone in charge, not as a friend. It can be expedient when there are things to get done. But sometimes… sometimes I want someone who will look me in the eye and speak to me as an equal."
Sasha swallowed. She hadn't thought about that. If she was going to be an alpha too…
Kyelle nodded. "I can see your thoughts and you're correct. You will be in the same position soon, as soon as you've proven your power to the clans. So, while I have taken a blow today and had to accept that I have lost Zev, that he will never be mine… I hope I have also proven that I can be trusted. And that as a friend I will always be honest with you."
"A friend?"
"Yes, Sasha. Because it is not your fault that Zev prefers you to me. So, while I may need to take space for myself to become accustomed after you have mated, I still believe the day will come that you and I can be here and speak as friends. And thoroughly enjoy turning Zev on his head," she said, then flashed a grin that faded quickly.
But Sasha smiled back.. "I hope you're right," she said.