Chapter 232 - Debrief
Chapter 232 – Debrief
ELRETH
"So… how was the honeymoon?" her mother asked quietly. They were both still sitting on the couch with their thoughts.
Elreth couldn't help but smile. "Right up until the last night it was… amazing."
Her mother turned to look at her and Elreth smiled. Her mother put a hand to her mouth and her eyes welled with tears.
"Don't cry, Mom! It was good!"
"I know! I'm so happy for you!"
"Oh, come on. You knew it was never going to be bad between me and Aaryn."
Her mother leaned over and took her arm, hugging it. "I certainly hoped. He loves you so much, El. It's really adorable. And I have to tell you, such a relief that he's not staring at you with those pleading, hungry eyes whenever you aren't looking anymore."
"Why didn't anyone ever tell me that?" Elreth groaned. "I might have gotten here a lot sooner."
Her mother sighed. "I doubt that, honestly. Your father wanted to tell you. Years ago. But especially the last few months. It was getting so… frustrating to watch. But I told him not to. I knew he needed to see you come to him without anyone else pushing you. And I thought you probably needed that too."
"I almost screwed it up, Mom," Elreth said quietly. "And now that I know what it's like to be so close to him… Honestly, it makes me go cold to think of missing this."
"Good, that's the way it should be," her mother said happily, hugging her arm tighter. "Now, tell me the juicy details. Did you try different positions?"
"Omigosh, Mom! I'm not talking to you about this!"
"Why not? I might be able to give you some ideas. I've been doing this a while now, you know. I have a list somewhere—"
"Ew! No! I am not—Mom! Stop!"
Her mother dissolved into giggles and Elreth slapped her shoulder and pulled her arm out of her grip. "You are not funny."
"Yes, I am, you just wish I was being funny to Gar instead."
"Please. Gar would just one-up you, then you'd be blushing and he wouldn't stop. Don't ever play this game with him."
"True, true," her mother sighed. "Okay, so I won't tease. But do tell me—it went well, obviously. Was there anything you had questions about? Or anything you didn't understand?"
Elreth thought back. "Not really. I guess… the only thing I'm curious about is… will it ever stop? The wanting? I mean, it's kind of crazy, Mom. I've never felt… driven to something like this before. It feels desperate. And that worries me, like, I have a job to do, you know?"
"Oh, honey, I pray you never lose that. Seriously. Yes, it will cool somewhat with time—and especially when you fight. But no, when you love and you're open with each other, the desire never leaves. Not completely. It's good and right to want your mate. Don't ever stifle that."
Elreth snorted. "I doubt that will be a problem."
"Trust me, when you get mad—or he hurts you, and he will hurt you, Elreth. And you'll hurt him too. No one will be able to hurt you more easily. He'll hurt you without thinking because he's a part of you. When he speaks something cruel, or makes the wrong decision without thinking of you… it will feel like he's cutting your heart out. It can get really easy then to just cut him off. Push him away. Because you don't want to get hurt again. But I'll tell you, the best thing you can do, is stay soft. Stay open. Be honest about your love. He'll still hurt you, but it will pave the way for you to heal. Pushing him away only adds to the hurt—and wounds him back. There will be days when you need to stay soft to him, and times he needs to stay soft to you. And it will suck. Seriously. The most painful days of your life will be the days you're fighting with your mate. But don't give up. Never give up."
Elreth sighed. "I won't."
"And always remember: Fighting sucks, but the making up can be delicious. So take every opportunity you can."
Elreth snorted. "I think I'll avoid the fighting if possible."
"Of course. I just meant, when you do fight—look for the windows for healing and don't deny them. Don't make him be the one to come to you every time. Cross the bridge, don't wait for him in the middle. It's hard. It's humbling. But when he comes back, when he lets you in, you'll be rewarded. The strongest ones have the softest hearts—and their pride can be a real obstacle. But Creator's Light, when they love you…" her mother sighed happily, and for the first time, Elreth heard the note in her mother that she'd felt herself. That yearning desire, the gratitude and thrill. The love.
"I think I know what you mean," she said quietly.
"Nothing would make me happier than to know that you do, El," her mother said. "Nothing. There's nothing more rewarding in life than love. Nothing. And nothing harder, either. So maybe that's why?"
"But what do you do when he's just being a jerk, or stubborn, or he just sees things differently than you do and he won't budge?"
"That's just life, honey," her mother said. "I mean, you just watched us go through that after over twenty years—and that wasn't the first time we'd been at odds, trust me. It was just the worst."
"So… how did you fix it?"
"I stayed soft, El. He hurt me over and over and over again, and I stayed soft. And he'd tell you, I hurt him worse, even though I don't see it that way. So when he came back, I didn't push him away. I can't tell you… honestly, I can't tell you how many people refuse to do that. You have to decide whether you want to be right, or you want to love. Because no one gets it right all the time—including you. So, either you accept that sometimes you're going to be right, but no one else will notice, and that's okay. Or you don't… and you get hurt when you push love away. Trust me, it's not worth it."
They stared at each other a moment, then Elreth leaned in and hugged her mother. "Thank you for loving me, Mom."
"Oh, honey, you are easy to love… Now, your brother…"
They both laughed.