Chapter 28 - The Queen Calling - Part 2
Chapter 28 – The Queen Calling – Part 2
AARYN
"Please, Aaryn," Elia said, barely above a whisper. "You are strong enough to be the brave one. And you're the only one strong enough to dominate her, and that's what she needs."
He coughed. "I can't make her submit."
Elia laughed. "You're the only one who can, it's why I know you were meant for each other. Even as a child, yours was the only lead she would follow. You are the only one who can get angry and walk away and she'll let you—she won't take that from anyone else, Aaryn. Not even us. She forces us to speak. And when she's being thickheaded like her father, it's only your words that stick."
He snorted. "I know that's not true."
"Do you know she was at our home after high moon last night, trying to understand why you were angry about Dargyn? Trying to justify herself, because she felt so uncomfortable about it all?"
"What?! What did you tell her?"
"Don't worry. Her father wanted to tell her—like her, he needs to be confronted, and he is losing patience with her. I think because it makes him reflect on his own obliviousness. But that's not what I came to tell you: Last night we did not lead her to the conclusion, but we did affirm your concerns to her. She thinks about things deeply when she decides to confront them. But she is avoiding this one. She fears where it will take her, and so is trying to make it into something too small. Don't let her. When she comes to you—and she will come to you, Aaryn, I'm certain of it. When she comes, don't reject her."
"I never would!" he gasped, then wanted the floor to open and swallow him up. He cleared his throat. "I mean… If she were certain of what she wanted—"
"The risk, Aaryn, is that she doesn't make the whole journey at once. That she comes to you because you're comfortable and safe and… that she comes to you without giving herself up. That she asks for your surrender without her own. Don't let her do that to you. Don't give in just for the signals. Make her offer everything."
"What?"
"Don't let her use you. Don't settle, Aaryn. You deserve her fully. Not just her body. And she deserves all of you, as well."
Aaryn swallowed. It was hard to think of having Elreth in front of him, offering that kind of connection and saying no… when it might open up the rest. His thoughts must have shown on his face, because Elia made a small, disapproving noise in her throat.
"I speak from experience: She's dominant, Aaryn. She carries everything, and everyone else around her. Do not be another one she must carry. Make her submit to you. Be the place where she can rest. Don't let her keep control. It will never work."
"Elia, I understand, but I'm not—"
"Can I offer something?"
They both turned, startled, to find his mother standing in the doorway, looking nervous.
"Mom, of course. I was just telling Elia—"
"I heard you, Aaryn, and I want to tell you something that… I want you to know that you're very like your father in this way," she said hesitantly. She knew he didn't like to hear about his traitorous father. "He was not someone who wanted control. He didn't want power for himself. So though he was dominant, he often chose not to use it with others… not until something mattered. Then he would step in. And others might be surprised. Because they often misjudged him. But… you are very much that way, son," she said, her eyes pleading with him not to be angry.
He frowned, but before he could respond, Elia spoke up.
"I've seen that side of you, Aaryn. And Reth mentioned that you showed it the other day when you felt he'd… misused Elreth. While I do not encourage others to snarl at my husband, there are definitely moments I applaud it, and that was one of them. You were very brave. And for her sake. I know… I know you're the right one."
The nerves and fear—and thrill—twisting in his stomach drove him to his feet. "None of this matters if she doesn't want me, Elia. None of this matters if I don't make her heart race!"
"I agree. What I think—what I know, is that you are the one who will do that for her, Aaryn. She just needs to have the idea presented. So, while I have been counselling my mate for years not to interfere, here I am, interfering. I hope you will forgive me for stepping in, but… I do not want to see her hurt herself—or you—in ways she can't heal. So I will leave you with this."
She stood and walked to stand in front of him where he'd stopped pacing. "Take her when she comes. Don't make her humble herself too much. But don't accept halfway from her either, Aaryn. Don't let her undervalue you. It won't work. She has to respect you as well as want you. And in the meantime… maybe show her that side of yourself that comes out when things matter."
Aaryn gulped. Elia put a hand to his face and smiled. "And when the time comes, be one hundred percent confident that you are welcome in our Pride, Aaryn. Never question it. Elreth did not get her lack of prejudice by chance."
Then she bade him farewell, hugged his mother, and left.
Was relieved when they both left the room, and his mother didn't return, but left him with this thoughts. He was relieved that he didn't have to answer any more questions.
But no matter what he did to distract himself, the conversation wouldn't stop playing in his head.
Or rather, the question wouldn't.
What was he going to do?