Chapter 39 - A Father's Love - Part 2
Chapter 39 – A Father’s Love – Part 2
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*****
ELRETH
She sighed and shook her head. "But if he really desired me, he wouldn't have rejected me tonight. There was nothing to hold us back."
"Oh, he desires you, Elreth. I'm willing to bet that was as plain as the—"
"Do NOT finish that sentence. You are my father!"
Reth chuckled again and pulled her into his chest, rubbing her back. "My girl, there is so much of you that makes me burst with pride. You will be the best ruler the Anima have ever seen. But you are not flawless, beautiful. And you must stop expecting it of yourself. And of others. It isn't possible. None of us are perfect. But the best of us make ourselves fully aware of our limits, and bring people alongside who are strong in those areas to stand in our gaps."
She swallowed. "I tried to bring him close. As my Advisor. And then… then just him… but he left me. Both times. So, you explain to me, Dad, why you say his scent is different when I'm close?"
"Well, I haven't asked him, of course, but in my experience, when the female the Creator intended for you is near, it's as if something inside yourself shifts and you become… fuller."
She blinks.
"You probably don't realize it, Elreth, but your scent shifts around him, too."
Her mouth dropped open. "It does?"
"You are always happier and more confident when he is close. That is a very, very good sign."
She snorted. "He's my closest friend. Of course I'm happier. And he believes in me. That makes me more confident."
Reth nodded, staring at her.
She turned away.
"It is your choice, of course," he said quietly. "But as your father, and the former leader of our people, I will offer you a piece of advice you may not want to hear, but that you need, Elreth."
"What?"
"Be willing to admit your mistakes—to yourself. Even more than to others. If you know you have done wrong, or been mistaken, let yourself see it. Don't argue it away. Own it. And change it if you can. And if you cannot, guard yourself against the same mistake again. It will make you a wise ruler, and an excellent Mate."
She swallowed. "But what if he won't have me now… now that I'm dominant?"
"Then he is not the male I think him to be," Reth growled. "But… is that honestly what you fear, Elreth?"
She looked away from his piercing gaze. "Not the only thing."
"So, I'll ask you again… did you try to dominate him tonight? Control him?"
She bit her lip. "Maybe? Not him, exactly, but… the situation?"
He stared down at her, his eyes warm with love. "El, when I finally got your mother to be mine—really mine—it was… it was hard letting go. I tried to control many things. Some to protect her. Some to protect myself. But I was already King, and experienced. And much older than you. I don't expect you to live as I lived. But I can tell you from experience: If you attempt to control the people you love, in the end, they won't just fight the control, they'll fight you. And that leaves no one happy.
"When your mother and I are alone, I am not King. I am just Reth. And I can't tell you what a relief that has been to me through the years. Sometimes it has been very… humbling. But mostly, it has given me rest." He hesitated rubbing her arms. "Let yourself rest in your mate, El."
"He's not my mate! He's not my anything."
"He will be, if you'll let him. But you have to let him. You have to trust yourself to him—and he'll have to trust himself to you. Face your fears, Elreth. Always. You will either learn that that they were unfounded and they will stop scaring you, or you will grow stronger and better able to face them in future so they cannot be used against you. There is nothing to be lost in making yourself walk into fear. Nothing."
"Except, you know, death."
"That is the one thing I know you do not fear, daughter. As your mother likes to say, you have the heart of a lion."
They both laughed. Then she got quiet.
"Go to him," Reth said softly. "Make it right. Say what needs to be said. Be patient. But also… be humble. Don't fear him, Elreth. He loves you. When a male loves you, he may make many mistakes, but no one will fight harder for you. No one. Not even me."
Elreth blinked away tears and finally let herself fall into his chest. "I love you, Dad."
"I love you, too, beautiful."
"And I want you to know I'll always love you," she whispered in his ear. "Even if you are old and weak now, and completely irrelevant."
Reth's laughter boomed across the meadow, echoing in the trees.
*****
AARYN
He hadn't been able to bring himself to go straight to the house and the inevitable questions from his mother. But he hoped she'd be asleep soon. So, instead he walked through the forest for a while. But eventually he knew it was time to trudge back home, through the now-empty trails of the Tree City, though there were still hoots and noises coming from the market. Some of the people were still enjoying themselves.
He couldn't stop seeing Elreth's face—her eyes hooded, breath coming faster, that wicked smile. The way she'd tries to pull him in. Her heated cheeks. And when she arched into him…
He groaned. He wouldn't have thought tasting her would make the yearning worse, but somehow… somehow it did. Now he knew what he was missing.
Three times he stopped and almost turned back. Almost went to her. She was confused. He knew. She was angry too—and until she understood, she would remain so. Embarrassed as well.
But then, always, right before he'd turn and run back to her, he'd remember…
"…I want to kiss you again, every day of your life," he whispered. "And touch you. Elreth, I want everything with you. Forever."
And he'd see the image of her face—wide with shock, eyes flashing fear.
Then he'd start towards home again. Because it was obvious. He'd awoken her tonight to the joys that could be found in the body of another. But not to love. Not for him, anyway.
As he approached the door—sighing with relief when he saw all the lights out—he heard the shuffle of feet on the dirt and turned, crouched, ready for attack.
"Sorry I scared you, Aaryn. I didn't mean to."
It was Gwyn, still dressed in her feast clothes, the cool night air nipping pink into her cheeks.
Aaryn straightened and sighed, raking a hand through his hair. "Hi, I… What are you doing here, Gwyn?"
"I've been waiting for you."
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