69 Shared pain
The breakfast atmosphere continued to be strange but Ravina was too tired to care. Even sitting felt like a difficult task. As usual, all of them left in hurry, leaving her behind with Aaron and Araminta.
“I am going to the stable. Do you want to come with me?” Aaron asked.
Ravina nodded.
“So what truly happened to your hands?” He asked as they walked to the stable. “I am sure you couldn’t have cut both.”
“I have a strange habit where I peel my skin off.” She told him.
He frowned. “Why?”
“I am not sure. It just feels good and I can’t help it. It gives me relief.”
“From what?” He asked curiously.
“From pain?”
“But…” he was confused and she could understand him.
“But that is painful too?”
“Yes.”
She shrugged. “I can’t explain it.”
He nodded disturbed. “Is there no other way for you to feel relief?”
She thought back to her inventions. “No.” She replied.
They arrived at the stable. “Are you sure you don’t like horses? The last time you took care of them, they weren’t happy to see me next.”
“I was afraid I hurt them.” She said remembering how she panicked at last.
“No. They liked you. I know horses.” He told her. “Do you want to go for a ride?”
“Sure.” She said not having anything better to do.
He provided her with a horse. “This is Ginger”
Honey and Ginger. Interesting.
“Do you give them the names?”
“Mostly.” He shrugged.
He prepared Ginger for her and then they went on a ride.
They started slow but Ravina enjoyed the wind against her hair so she rode faster and faster and Aaron easily kept up with her. They lived in beautiful lands of green landscapes, woods, and mountains. They even rode near the river and at last, they slowed down when they came to a field of flowers.
Ravina watched the beauty of it in awe. So beautiful it almost brought tears to her eyes.
“Do you like flowers?”
“No.” She breathed. She never liked anything so brought, so colorful and beautiful. Something so unlike herself.
“I thought every woman liked flowers.” He said.
“Does it work? Giving a woman flowers?”
He smiled. “I have never done it.”
“Why not?”
“Well, being the youngest, most women are interested in my older brothers.”
Why? Status? Because he didn’t look much different from his brothers. The same sculpted face and black shining hair. The bronzed skin and the body that only dragon males seemed to have.
Was it a characteristic thing? Maybe dragon females liked a certain type and Aaron didn’t fit in. Her guess was dominance.
“Why?” She asked.
“They are older. Stronger.”
She nodded. “Well, you will find your breedmate anyway. Right?”
“I hope to find her soon.” He said.
She felt somehow bad for him. While his brother bragged about being natural, this man felt like he could not get a woman. His self-confidence was ruined. Not that she was fond of promiscuous men. She found them rather hypocritical like Malachi, although she wondered if he called her a whore out of pure anger or if he meant it. She wouldn’t be surprised if it was the latter. Most men had that mentality.
They continued their journey and then rested near the river. “I heard you have a sister that is lost.”
She nodded. “Yes.”
“Do you think she is with dragons?”
“I don’t know anymore.” She sighed.
He just frowned.
“Your sister. She passed away.” Ravina began.
“Yes.”
“May I ask what happened?”
He stared ahead at the river and she had a feeling it wasn’t good. “She killed herself.”
Ravina stiffened. Of everything… suicide?
“Why?” She breathed, heart pounding.
Aaron’s jaw clenched. “Some men… including her breedmate…” He couldn’t bring himself to continue but he didn’t need to. She already knew what he was going to say and her stomach turned.
“That is why… my family don’t trust you.” He explained.
She became confused. “I don’t understand.”
“Her breedmate was human.”
What? She thought that was rare. And…
“How could he…”
“With your father’s inventions.”
She froze. That wasn’t possible. The public didn’t have access to her father’s inventions and soldiers did not carry them around. Unless they somehow snuck them out.
“I am sorry,” she said horrified and not knowing what else to say.
He shook his head, looking down. “It is not your fault.”
Ravina was still speechless, imagining what Amal went through. She often dreaded marriage thinking of what she would have to endure so to think something much worse happened to a woman, always pained her. Infuriated her.
“What happened to those men?” She asked.
He turned to her. “We killed them. Slowly.”
She hoped very slowly, but she knew that would bring them no relief. She knew from experience.
“You know…” He began his voice tight. “When you told me that if I don’t have a voice I have nothing. I felt it deep inside. I kept quiet about many things. Many things that were wrong. Many things I could have prevented and even if not, I should have spoken up against. But I didn’t. And my silence is a reason for many of the things that happened.”
Realizing and admitting something so deep was painful and tragically beautiful.
“I won’t stay silent anymore.” He told her.
She nodded.
He shook his head with a faint smile. “I am sorry. I keep talking. I ruined the mood.”
“No. I am sorry. I was the one who asked.”
“I am glad you did. I was never able to talk about this with anyone.”
She understood why though she found it sad that he couldn’t talk to his family about it.
“Well, I barely do anything during the days so I am here to listen if you need to talk.”
A smile curved his lips. “I am sure Malachi would like that.”
He was sarcastic?
“Are you saying… he would be jealous?”
He shrugged.
“You are his brother.”
“I am still a man.”
“But I am not your breedmate.”
“I am still a man.” He repeated.
Unbelievable. “I am confused.” She admitted.
He chuckled. “We are dragons. We are hot-blooded males waiting for their breedmate. That doesn’t mean we desire no one else until then. We are still in many ways like your men.”
“Well, I don’t want to put you in trouble otherwise I would enjoy making your brother miserable, especially since he thinks highly of himself.”
Aaron laughed. “Trust me, you are already making him miserable.”