Be Gentle, Immortal Master

Chapter 161 – The Better Question

The room was dead silent. I kept my forehead touched to the ground, and I could feel Teng Yuan's gaze piercing me from the back of my head as I waited for his response.

I knew he had the answer I needed. From the way he looked at me ever since the first day we met, I could tell that he had figured something no one else did. I didn't know how he managed at first, but after Su Nian's visit today, I realized that it was because Bai Ye had called me "Qing-er" in front of him and asked him to help protect me. Bai Ye had shown him how special I was … and seeing Twin Stars on my belt, Teng Yuan must've guessed that I was the girl from Bai Ye's past.

I didn't know if I could convince Teng Yuan to tell me anything about it though. After all, he was Bai Ye's friend, and Bai Ye clearly didn't want me to know the rest of the truth. All I could do was try my best.

As I expected, Teng Yuan said stiffly after a long pause, "What makes you ask such a question, and what makes you think I know the answer?"

I rose. Succinctly, I told him about the vision in the crystal orb, the suspicions I had about my relationship to the girl in the vision, and the history of Twin Stars that Bai Ye had told me a while back. I skipped the part about what I learned at the village though. "I can tell that you knew of my previous self," I said in the end, "as well as the reason why my master had kept those details from me. Since he is no longer here to tell me the rest of the story … I can only ask for your help."

Teng Yuan smiled. "If Bai Ye didn't want to tell you more, then he must have his reasons. Why should I go against his will and spill his secrets to you?"

I knew this question was coming, and I had kept trying to find the best answer on my way to this hall. "Because I still have access to Twin Stars while he is away," I tried the one that I thought was the most convincing. "If there are secrets I don't know of related to those swords, I might unknowingly cause another disaster with them."

"That's the Gatekeeper's pointless worry." Teng Yuan shook his head. "Like Bai Ye said, Twin Stars no longer holds the same power it used to. You will not be able to wreak the same havoc with it even if you wanted to."

"Because what my master is doing … may not be right," I tried again. "Everyone knows the risk of resorting to the dark power of demonic swords. If he is still coveting such power, we need to help and stop him before it's too late."

This time, Teng Yuan laughed. "Your excuses are grand, but unfortunately, as long as Twin Stars doesn't have the ability to overturn Mount Hua again, I have no interest in overseeing other people's righteousness."

I bit my lips. Teng Yuan knew I wasn't telling the truth … But why did it matter to him? Was he guarding the secret because he had made a promise to Bai Ye, or did he simply not trust my intention?

"Because …" I lowered my head, deciding that if Teng Yuan truly knew who I was, then nothing between Bai Ye and me would be shocking news to him anyway, and I could afford to be honest for once. "Because … I love him, and I'm afraid. He told me before he left that he might spend years on this retreat. I'm afraid that if I spend all this time doubting him and suspecting him, I'll have nothing but hate left for him when he comes back. Even if all of this was only a misunderstanding, it will be too late to correct anything by then. If you treat him as a friend … you wouldn't want to see that happen either."

This was the first time I ever acknowledged my feelings for Bai Ye to someone else. I thought I might feel embarrassed, or even ashamed for such a sin, but I didn't. The words rolled off of my tongue as naturally as if I was talking about the weather.

Teng Yuan looked at me. Then he smiled again. "Do you think Bai Ye hasn't considered that possibility?"

My heart suddenly skipped a beat. Teng Yuan was right … No one knew me as well as Bai Ye, and he must've expected me to feel this way right now. But why? Was he not concerned that my feelings for him might change because of it?

Just as I helplessly tried to search for another excuse, Teng Yuan waved a hand and gestured for me to stop. "It's alright. He had asked me before to give you my help when you are in need … and since you seem so desperate right now to know the truth, he can't blame me for it." He stood up from his chair, pacing towards the window. "Has he ever told you about the spirit of a sword?"

I didn't know why Teng Yuan started with such an irrelevant topic, but seeing that he had finally agreed to my request, I let out a sigh of relief and nodded at once. "He mentioned it briefly," I said. "He told me that the spiritual power used to forge Twin Stars captured the purest essence from the heavens and the earth, which could evolve over time into a consciousness with a will of its own."

"And sometimes those consciousnesses can be so complex that they become indistinguishable from a human soul," Teng Yuan said. "You asked me to tell you who you are. But the better question you should've asked is … what you are."

I stared at him in speechless disbelief. WHAT I am? He couldn't mean that I was … the spirit of Twin Stars?