Chapter 20: Florida Man Gets Rich Selling Trash
Chapter 20 – Florida Man Gets Rich Selling Trash
Just a few minutes ago, Leo was busy scooping purple substances into the glass pot. He heard the footsteps and the creaking sound of the store’s door, so he rushed to the cabin to check.
Leo was not disappointed. A wild customer appeared even though he was on the ugly side.
Trying to be friendly, Leo initiated the conversation.
“Is there something I can do for you, mister?”
The pimple man instantly knelt and cupped his fist, “Please forgive this junior for trespassing senior’s abode!”
“Huh?”
Leo pursed his lips. Once again, his customer made the situation awkward. But since he showed respect, Leo didn’t mind doing business with the guy.
He activated the shop domain and revealed his customer’s status.
Name: Jin Yong
Age: 22
Remaining Lifespan: 167 Years, 5 Months, 24 Days, 1 Hour, and 42 Minutes.
Compared to Han Meng or Wu Buyi, this guy didn’t have much lifespan, but he was somewhat better than Gao Yan. Still, Leo needed to get something out of this man.
“You have a Daoist nickname?” Leo asked as he didn’t want to reveal his ability or secret that he knew the guy’s name.
Jin Yong dryly laughed and confessed, “I’m still the first rank of the foundation establishment stage. I still have a long way to go until the golden core stage and get my Daoist Name, senior.”
Leo raised his brow. He heard something related to the culture of this cultivation world. He probed further.
“What are you doing here, mister?”
“Senior, I heard about your rumor, and I come here to pay respect. I have no intention of doing anything disrespectful!”
“…”
Leo smiled and repeatedly nodded. He was glad to hear it as the viral marketing method started to show some results. In a good mood, Leo put the poison water pot down on the pill table next to the display windows.
Before Leo could say anything, Jin Yong looked up and gazed at the purple liquid in the pot.
“S-Senior. I heard you are selling precious herbs. C-Can I buy some?”
Nothing made Leo happy more than getting an enthusiastic customer, “Stand up, mister. Is there something you need?”
“Y-Yes,” Jin Yong stood up. He glanced at the showcase fridge’s immortal grass at first. However, his instinct drove his eyes toward the purple liquid on the pill table.
Leo followed Jin Yong’s gaze and noticed that his customer was interested in the finished products. He smiled and opened the plastic Tupperware, showing him the grain pills.
“Are you interested in grain pills?”
Jin Yong widened his eyes as he recognized the aura of Fire Qi, Metal Qi, and other elements. Moreover, one of them produced Poison Qi, which was beneficial to him.
Alchemists always used low-graded ingredients to make grain pills. As a result, most food pills only filled their stomach, but they didn’t give elemental Qi that they could cultivate. As for ingredients with elemental Qi, they usually saved them to make a more difficult pill.
Secondly, the only places cultivators could accumulate elemental Qi were mystic realms, which opened once every three months. Therefore, every cultivation pill, herb, or artifact that produced elemental Qi was more precious than spirit stones or gold.
Seeing so many grain pills with elemental Qi, Jin Yong was distracted. He pointed at the purple pills in the Tupperware as they contained necessary poison Qi that he needed.
“H-How much is this, senior?”
Leo gazed at the plastic box in his hand. As he concocted iron grain pills every hour, he got several purple pills as byproducts. Averagely, Leo got one inferior poison grain pill per batch. So far, he collected 25 poison element pills.
As these poisonous grain pills were useless to Leo, he was more than happy to sell them. He pointed at the floating lifespan status in front of Jin Yong, introducing the store system, “See the text, mister?”
“!!!”
Finally, Jin Yong noticed the status of his lifespan. His throat was dry, and his pupils dilated.
“I-Is this my lifespan?!”
“Yes. Also, in my store, your lifespan is the currency. For example, I sell these for…”
Leo paused for a moment to think of the price tag. Then, he raised three fingers.
“Three years of lifespan per pill. How about it?”
After showing Jin Yong three fingers, Leo inwardly cursed himself as he thought it might be too expensive. His instinct told him that one year per pill was enough since these things decreased the consumer’s lifespan. No matter how he looked at it, these poison grain pills were trash.
Jin Yong widened his eyes in shock. His voice cracked, and his heart raced. He couldn’t believe what he heard.
Not everybody could enter the mystic realm to cultivate elemental Qi there. Every season, all sects chose their most promising disciples and elders before they dispatched the teams to the mystic realms. In addition, the quota was limited due to the restriction of each mystic realm. An average alchemist trainee like Jin Yong might not be able to earn the right to join the expedition.
Getting these pills were equivalent to obtaining the quota to join the event. Moreover, if Jin Yong could drastically improve his cultivation base by consuming these poison grain pills before the event, he might earn the quota for the expedition, killing two birds with one stone.
In short, three years of lifespan per pill was dirt cheap for such an opportunity!
“T-THREE YEARS PER PILL?! REALLY?!”
Leo deeply sighed. Judging from the reaction, he was convinced that it was overpriced. He silently sealed the plastic boxes and prepared to get scolded by an angry customer.
Betraying Leo’s expectation, Jin Yong said in a clear voice.
“I’ll TAKE EVERY PILL, SENIOR!!”
“Hah?”
Leo was taken aback. There were 25 purple pills in three plastic boxes, but this guy wanted all of them. The total price was 75 years of lifespan.
“Are you sure? That’s 75 years, you know?”
“Senior, 75 years is nothing if I have those pills!” Jin Yong insisted.
Leo started to feel bad. He revealed some of the hidden information about the pills.
“Do you know that poison grain pills decrease your lifespan upon consumption? If you eat all of them, you will lose 25 years of your lifespan on top of that. If we combine the total lifespan you lose, it’s 100 years!”
“Senior, are you joking? I’ll gladly throw away 100 years of my lifespan for those pills! Please sell them to me. I really need it!”
“…”
Leo stroked his beard and gave Jin Yong a meaningful look. Half of him felt bad for the ugly guy, but his capitalist side was screaming that he should take the deal.
In the end, the capitalist heart demon won. Leo brightly smiled and opened the plastic Tupperware, allowing Jin Yong to collect them. As he didn’t want to spread the plastic technologies to this world, Leo decided not to give Jin Yong the Tupperware boxes.
“Go ahead, take them. I won’t ask what you’re gonna do with them, but… good luck.”
“THANK YOU, SENIOR!”
Jin Yong collected the purple pills and put them in his sleeve pockets in glee. Then, his lifespan status changed as 75 years were deducted from the pool.
However, after collecting everything, Jin Yong was not done. He gazed at the purple fluid in the transparent pot. He hadn’t given up the tempting liquid yet.
“Senior, if I may ask, could you tell me what that water is? It smells like snake poison sacs.”
“Oh, this?”
Leo bitterly smiled. This was the newest product that he wasn’t proud of. After all, it was as useless as the poison grain pills.
Lesser Yin Poison Potion
– Adds Yin Energy to Dantian.
– Increase Poison Resistance.
– Increase Poison Qi by two years’ worth of cultivation per 10cc.
– High Chance of Causing Gastritis.
What was the point of drinking something that could cause gastritis? Leo regretted spending six hours to make a liter of this poisonous water.𝒏𝗈𝑣𝖊𝓵𝐍𝐄xt.𝗰𝒐𝗆
“This might be too much for you. It’s incomplete, and it will harm your constitution. Do not be greedy.”
“Oh…”
Jin Yong was dejected. Still, he didn’t give up, “T-Then, can I have a small portion of it? J-Just a few drops are fine!”
Leo deeply sighed. Since the guy asked for it, he let Jin Yong learn a harsh lesson through the results.
“Alright. Let me get a container.”
“No need senior. I have this!”
Jin Yong brought out a little bamboo canteen, which could be used to store fresh water. He drank everything inside and passed it to Leo.
“Please store the liquid in here, senior.”
“… Okay.”
Leo received the canteen. Measuring it with his eyes, Leo estimated that it could only hold about 500-600cc of the fluid. He scooped the liquid from the pot with a ladle and carefully poured it into the container to the brim.
Not wasting a single drop, Leo sealed the canteen with its plug and passed it to Jin Yong.
“Consider it a promotion. You can have that for free.”
“!!!”
Jin Yong’s hands trembled as he slowly retrieved the container. After putting it in his, Jin Yong kowtowed, “THANK YOU FOR YOUR KINDNESS, SENIOR! I’LL BE SURE TO COME BACK AND REPAY YOU WHEN I’M SUCCESSFUL!”
Leo rolled his eyes as he had heard a similar line before. He waved his hand.
“Instead of that, how about you repay me now by spreading the word about my store. I’m selling pills and weed for cheap. Of course, I only accept lifespan.”
Jin Yong’s eyes gleamed. He slammed his head against the floor and caused a loud noise.
Leo’s face darkened. He was afraid that this ugly guy might destroy his house. Fortunately, the floor was intact, and there was no scratch mark.
“I’ll tell everybody in the Sixth Element Sect, senior! I’ll even invite the elders there!”
“… Okay.”
“Umm.” Jin Yong slowly stood up and asked Leo.
“Could I know your name, senior?”
Once again, Leo widely grinned. He puffed his chest with pride and bragged about his name.
“My Daoist name is Florida Man!”
After a brief chat, Jin Yong excused himself and left. Before he left, he glanced at the fridges with the black grasses and other goodies.
‘With the poison pills and the poison liquid in my hands, I should be able to jump from first rank of foundation establishment stage to fifth rank at least! With this progress, the main sect will have no choice but to recall me! Then, I might even secure a spot in the next mystic realm expedition!’
Jin Yong departed. His laughter echoed in the forest. Still, he swore that he would come back here to return this favor one day.
‘I’ll be back, Senior Florida Man! I’ll be your customer again!’
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