Heart of Darkness

Angelica’s body jerked as she cried in his arms. It was a heartwrenching cry that added to his pain. He stroked her back as he began to cry in silence as well.

Angelica pulled away. “You scared me. Don’t do that again.” She scolded.

He was scared too. Wiping her tears away she grabbed his face in her hands. He hated to cry in front of others. It still felt wrong to do so. He cringed inside but he couldn’t help it.

“You did well. It will be alright now.” She comforted.

He shook his head. “I don’t know if I will be alright. It hurts so much.” He admitted.

She tiptoed and hugged him again. “You will be. I will take care of you.” She said stroking his hair.

Rayven wrapped his arms around her and cried on her shoulder. He didn’t care to hold back because he was embarrassed or because he shouldn’t cry. He just did. Angelica murmured some comforting words but they were distant in his mind. Yet he was comforted by her voice alone. Comforted in a way that only made him cry more.

He didn’t know how long he had been crying in her arms while standing in the balcony but suddenly she was holding his hand and leading him back to his room. She told him to get up on his bed and he listened like a child. Then she looked at his feet but he was quick to pull them away.

“Let me see.”

“No.” He said embarrassed. “I am alright.”

She looked at him for a long moment then sighed. “Alright. Why don’t you lay down and rest?”

“You haven’t slept as well.” He told her.

She crawled up on his bed and lay down on her side. He lay down as well, facing her. They had both stayed up the whole night, agonizing. He knew she was as tired as him. His head was throbbing in pain but he just watched her. He watched in awe, in happiness and in sadness, in relief and in pain. His tears seemed to never end and one tear escaped from his eye falling across his nose to the other side of his face.

Angelica wiped the tear away gently with her fingers before resting her hand on his cheek and caressing it with her thumb. Rayven closed his eyes, listening to their breathing and to her heartbeat until he fell asleep.

He had never had this kind of sleep in what felt like forever. There was no nightmare, no waking up in the middle or being half awake. He just fell into a long and deep slumber. One where he felt rested when he woke up in the afternoon.

Feeling refreshed and at ease, he sat up. He was alone and wondered where Angelica had left. Getting out of bed he went to look for her. When he came to her room, he heard her speak to Sarah inside. Then the door opened and Sarah gasped when she stepped outside and almost bumped into him.

“Good afternoon, My Lord.” She greeted and then hurried away.

“Oh, you are awake.” Angelica smiled standing in her room. “Come in.”

He walked in feeling the steam in the room. A bath was prepared. He looked at her.

“I was just thinking of waking you up. I prepared a bath for you here to not disturb you.” She played with her fingers and he could hear the change in her heartbeat. “If you want.” She added quickly. “I thought it would help you relax and feel good.”

Rayven nodded. “Thank you.”

He slowly made his way to the tub and then looked back at Angelica. Her cheeks flushed a bright red. “I will leave you alone.” She hurried to say.

“Do you have to leave?” He asked.

Her eyes widened. “do you want me to stay?” She asked shyly.

“Yes.”

It wouldn’t be the first time she saw a male body even though it felt like it. He began to wonder but his mind refused to go in that direction. He wasn’t ready. No, he just didn’t want to do it now. Because when he did, he would lose control. He would punish himself and then go find those who touched her. He would save Lord Green for last.

Rayven began to undress while trying to control his anger. He glanced over at Angelica who avoided looking at him until he got into the water. It was interesting to hear the change in her heartbeat depending on what happened but he wasn’t sure why the change occurred.

“Do you want me to help you?” she asked getting closer.

Rayven hadn’t let anyone touch him as much as he was touched today. He still felt like it was wrong to get too close to her before she knew everything. Clearly, she was frightened of fangs and claws. Who wouldn’t be? He guessed that even William would have been frightened if he saw his demon. Besides the boy already had visions of creatures like him, unlike Angelica.

Usually, the clever and rational ones were the ones to believe the least in creatures like him. That was why she didn’t believe in the rumors about him but that would also make her not believe his words. She would always find a more authentic explanation until he showed her. He would have to show her little by little, but he couldn’t deny that he was terrified to see her reaction.

Changing her way of approaching him, “let me help you.” She said instead when he didn’t reply.

She went behind him and started with his hair. Taking some water from the tub with a small jar she poured it over his hair and then began to massage his scalp. After crying for so long he had suffered from a headache so the water and her fingers in his hair felt so good.

“Did you get some sleep?” He asked her.

“Yes. Did you sleep well?” ρꪖꪕᦔꪖꪕꪫꪣꫀ​ꪶ​

“Never slept better.” He replied.

“I am glad to hear that.” He could hear the smile in her voice. “I will help you wash your back.” She then told him.

Rayven leaned forward and Angelica began to gently rub a washcloth on his back.

“What do you like to eat, My Lord?” She asked breaking the silence that didn’t feel awkward at all. He was just enjoying being taken care of. “You must be hungry. We should have dinner soon.”

“Anything is fine.” He said.

When she was done with his back she came to his left side. She took his hand in her long fragile fingers before she began to wash his hand with such care. As if being a little rough would hurt him or as if she was tending to a wound.

Rayven felt something move in his chest. Rather than making his heart bleed, it felt like he was growing a heart. One that would burst as soon as it was fully grown.

“Your hand is smooth for a warrior.” She said looking up at him.

He knew it was a question. She was very observant but since he didn’t want to lie he just said, “I know.”

She smiled and continued up to his arm, moving the cloth gently along his skin.

Rayven was melting slowly and she wasn’t even touching him with her bare hand. He watched her, unable to tear his eyes away from her face. He wanted to touch her, caress her cheek and trace her delicate lips with his finger. Then he noticed the slight frown on her face. She was lost in thought and thinking of something unpleasant it seemed.

“Is something wrong?” He asked her.

“Huh, ” She looked up her eyes widening and then as if realizing that she had been absent she shook her head. “No. Everything is fine.” She forced a smile before looking down again. She was lying.

He grabbed her chin and made her look at him. “What is wrong? Tell me.”

Her eyes darted and she contemplated whether to tell him or not. “Up from the balcony I could see our house. It seems like it was sold or they are selling it. I could see people coming in and out.”

Rayven didn’t like the sad expression on her face. “Sold?” He said feeling anger rise in him.

“I am sorry. I shouldn’t talk about this now. That is not my home anymore. I just… I have my things still left there.”

He cupped her cheek. “It is your home and it will remain so. I won’t let anyone take it.” He promised.

And now he was making promises. He cursed himself.

Rayven could see the light back in her eyes and a slight smile on her face. “Thank you.” She whispered.

A strange feeling came over him. A feeling of wanting to give her everything and anything she asked for.

Angelica looked at him through her long thick lashes, seducing his body to act on its own accord. And just like that his fingers slid from her cheek and to her lips. He traced her upper lip and then her bottom lip with his thumb following the movement with his gaze. Angelica parted her lips and he could hear how she sucked in air but then stopped breathing alltogether. Her heart began to beat faster and her cheeks flushed.

Just a taste, Rayven told himself. It wouldn’t hurt. Would it? But it was too late to ask himself. He was already leaning closer and Angelica closed her eyes before he captured her lips with his.

His body reacted instantly to the touch of her lips. He kissed her, sipped at her lips and tasted her mouth. She was more intoxicating than wine and he was already addicted.

He parted her lips with his tongue before teasing his way into her mouth. She moaned against his lips and grabbed onto his shoulders. Oh, how he wanted to feel those fingers in his back while having her naked beneath him. Just the thought of it made his fangs forcefully elongate.

Rayven groaned in both pain and pleasure as his control wavered. Grabbing her hair he pulled her head back and she gasped. His lips already sought her neck.

He was going to ruin everything. He had to tell her first. But he was already tasting her, feeling her pulse beneath his tongue.

Angelica shivered and her hand slipped from his shoulder and went to touch his chest. Rayven stiffened. Not his chest.

Memories of his chest being opened, his ribs separated and his heart ripped out came to mind and he pulled away from her. Removing her hand from his chest he took a few deep breaths. He didn’t like having his chest touched.

Flustered Angelica looked at him confused. She was short of breath as well. Rayven didn’t want her to get the wrong idea. He also didn’t want to be afraid anymore.

Taking her hand he slowly placed it on his chest. Angelica looked at his chest and then at him. “Your heart is beating fast..” She said.